Knowing you, Knowing me
by Mezzy-Pen
Summary: Little stories of how Jazz and Prowl get together. Yeah it will be slash: so please if you don't like please move along. G1 verse. Rating may go up.
1. Prologue: How it all began

******Warnings:** there will be slash, dont like dont read.

**disclaimer:** I don't own transformers i just hurt them

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**Prologue: How it all began...**

The young black and white mech look around the ruin of the house in pain, they were too late. The enforcers along with their senior Academy students had been on a mission to bring down an escape criminal, however the mission was over their heads before they knew it. They had received a tip-off on where the criminal might be heading, for once the source was right and they were to slow. They arrived to smoking ruins and a crackling maniac dancing over the still smoking metal, sure they had caught the maniac but they hadn't saved the two mechs from being deactivated. Jazz had seen them remove their empty shells, the sight made him want to purge his tanks.

The older enforcers had ordered the students to find any information they could inside what was left of the house, Jazz walked carefully up the half destroyed stairs that creaked unsteadily under his feet. When he finally reached the landing there were four doors, the first one he entered was the basic wash room nothing else, the door along had a wide berth some family photos, enegron was spilt over some walls. Splattered, as if they had come from sliced enegron lines in a mech, Jazz's processor raced with the images of the mangled mechs with twisted amour and drying enegron on their frames. Jazz quickly scanned the room and picked up as many as the photos he could he fled the room and went to the next one, this one had a small berths in it with lots of toys scattered about it Jazz smiled at the thought of a little sparkling playing peacefully in this room. The last room was slightly apart from the others, the first thing Jazz felt was the stirred coldness in the room as if it had been empty for a long time but only just been re-entered. Again there were a lot of personal items that Jazz subspaced, once the room was clear he began to move to the door, where he could do a full scan of the room. However, his scan showed life in the room. Under the berth just out of sight was an energy signature. Getting down on his servo's and knees Jazz cautiously peered under, curled up into a tight ball was a tiny black and white winged sparkling with his optics offlined.

"Hey," Jazz called softly, the sparkling raised his head ever so slightly and powered up his optics. "Watcha doin'?" The sparkling cocked his head to the side at the strange accent of the new stranger; he had never heard that kind of voice before. It was welcoming and soft, but his creators had told him strictly not to move until his brother came to get him. The sparkling had intrigued Jazz; he seemed intelligent and aware of what had happen but was refusing to move towards him. "Am not gunna hurt ya, ah wanna take ya somewhere safe." The sparkling still refused to move. "Am a good guy, ah need to getcha outta ere it ain't safe. Please." The sparkling hesitated, stuck between going with the nice mech and disobeying his creators.

"Smokey." Whispered the Sparkling, his little frame shaking a little bit.

"Smokey eh? Ya brother?" Jazz rummage though the photos finding a picture of what he assumed to be the Sparklings sibling, he held up the photo and pointed to it. "Smokey?" The little one nodded, and slowly began to crawl out from underneath the berth. Jazz signed in relief; he quickly scooped up the Sparkling and walked out of the room. Now he had the sparkling safely in his arms, he contacted his watcher: Codejack.

:: Jazz ta Codejack::

:: Codejack here, what's up Jazz? ::

:: Found summit that might interest ya::

:: What's that then? ::

:: ah littl'un::

:: Primus! A sparkling!::

:: aye, am bringing him down to ya now. Jazz out::

Jazz spotted his watcher at once, the orange mech stood out quite well; he walked straight towards him with the sparkling still curled up to his chest. The large mech came forward when he spotted the younger mech that carried a sparkling, if it wasn't for the red Chevron he wouldn't have seen the youngster.

"Well, that one we didn't expect to find, anything thing else?"

"Nah, just sum photos." He handed over the one still in his servo. "Littl'un said it was his brother. Smokey." His watcher nodded, and looked at the photo. His optics widens a little in surprise, Jazz casually raised an optic ridge but the older mech ignored him. He placed a large servo on the sparklings head; slowly he turned to the face him.

"Smokescreen? Is he your brother?"

"Smokey." The sparkling nodded, and pointed to the picture again. Codejack nodded almost mimicking.

"I'll get your brother little one, I know who he is." He ran a clawed servo over the sparkling's helm, only to have him flinch away and curl inwards towards Jazz. "Well, look like he has chosen you to look after him. Go have him looked at by the medics, then report back to base." Codejack turned to leave, but Jazz had one more question.

"Wouldn't it be better to take him to base, then have him looked at? Surely Ratchet is more qualified?" okay two questions. Codejack smiled, and just nodded walking away.

Hours later Jazz had little Prowl sat between his spread legs on the floor, the sparkling was playing with a small ball Jazz had managed to find. The ball had rolled out of the little one's reach, wrinkling the little bridge of his nose in determination; the little one pulled himself to his feet and took a hesitate step. Then another, slowly he toddled away, Jazz was watching him out of the side of his optic, and was at his side the instant he fell back onto his aft and started to cry. Picking up his young charge and the ball, he rocked and sang the sparkling into a light recharge and continued to do so under the stars. Codejack and Ironhide watched from a high window, Codejack had an odd smile on his face while Ironhide maintained his gruff exterior.

"They'll be great one day, Officers I bet." Ironhide muttered gruffly. "Might have to take Smokescreen up on that, no doubt he'll place a bet that Prowl would become a Second in command to a prime. That will be the day." Codejack nodded absentmindedly, optics still on the pair.

"They will be great Ironhide, but not for their work." Ironhide looked at the old enforcer with a critical optic; everyone knew Codejack was a priest before his sanctuary was ransacked, and you had to have some sort of special connection to Primus to be a priest. "They will be great because of the love they will share, they will be spark mates. It won't be easy, but then again nothing ever is in the matter of hearts."

"Next you will be asking be to protect that love, cause one day it will be the faith that keeps the lost surviving Autobots together when they get stuck on some foreign planet. Like that would ever happen!" Ironhide finished with a snort.

"I don't have to ask friend, I already know you will." Ironhide made no reply, but Vorns later he would makes that very promise. "Smokescreen will be here in 4 orns to collect his brother. So let's see the little one is settled in for the night."

Jazz held Prowl close to his chest as he made it though the crowds, he was suppose to meet Prowl's brother Smokescreen a few kilks ago, and Judging on how Prowl had been acting the last few orns everything had to be on time at the time expected. Finally, Jazz reached the destination point, only there wasn't a single mech that looked like Smokescreen, surprised Jazz looked in the surrounding crowd. There were femmes checking the times of transport shuttles, Guards posted at some points, some regal looking mechs that were being escorted to a private shuttle, and some lads playing a gambling game. He couldn't see the mech anywhere. Then he spotted the blue doorwings held high in the air as the mech himself bent down to collect his winnings of the game, when he next looked up he spotted Jazz and tiny Prowl he bid the others farewell moving quickly to his brother and guardian.

"Smokescreen." Jazz held out a servo to greet the mech, who took it with a smile.

"Jazz." Prowl then turned to look at his brother, his smile was wide. Smokescreen ran a servo over his helm, his optics sad and distant. "Hey Prowl, have you been good for Jazz?" The little one nodded, before his brother turned his eyes back to the black and white mech. "I do hope he was no trouble, he does have his own personal timetable he likes to stick to."

"Nah, ma mech, litt'un was na trouble at all. Made ah change to hav 'im around." Jazz said, Prowl made a whining noise and held out his arms to his brother, quickly Jazz handed the little one over to the elder. Prowl wrapped his tiny arms around his brother's neck whilst gently nuzzling his neck, Smokescreen held his brother tightly against him and returned the nuzzle slightly.

"Thank you Jazz." Jazz shrugged off the apology with a disarming smile; he turned to leave when he heard a cry of sadness behind him. Prowl had turned in his brothers arms, and held out his little servo's for Jazz, his little face was sad and little tears of coolant verged on his optics. Turning back, he gathered the little sparkling close.

"Ah havta go Prowler, ya gunna stay with ya brother, kay? Ah don't how, but ah know ah see ya'll again. Trust meh?" the little one nodded before hesitantly putting his arms around his neck, they nuzzled slightly; Jazz drew away brushing one small cheek with a servo before handing Prowl back to his brother. Nodding once more to Smokescreen Jazz walked away, this time he didn't turn back to the cries because he knew if he did he would never be able to turn back again. Like he had told Prowl, he didn't know how or why, but he knew he would see him again, one way or another.


	2. Midnight Dark: Chapter 1

**Summary:** After vorns since they last parting, Prowl and Jazz are about to meet again, just not under the circumstances they wanted.

**Warning: **Slash, swearing, and hints of rape.

**disclaimer:** I don't own transformers i just hurt them

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_** Midnight Dark: Chapter 1:**_

_Jazz moved steadily though the streets of Iacon; he had almost completed his round just seven more breems, and then he could go to his concert he had been raving about for the last primus knows solar cycles. He slowly turned the second to last corner; he saw what was happening before he heard the broken scream echo though out the empty roads. For two astroseconds he was frozen unsure what to do or if he was in fact seeing what he was, finally his processors caught up with his optics and he leapt into action pulling the obviously older and heavier mech off his victim and knocked him into stasis quicker than the mech had time to process what was happening. In stasis cuffs and unaware of what has happen, the mech was peering at Jazz with complete confusion and satisfaction. It made Jazz sick. Not a breem later reinforcement arrived along with Codejack, Jazz's old mentor, and Ratchet, for the victim Jazz had yet to approach. He nodded t them both and then proceed to take them deeper into the alley where the other one laid, the first Jazz recognised were the doorwings, one was in a twisted angle held high in the air while the other was crushed under them. The victim lay on their side facing away from them, yet Jazz knew it was another mech for his frame was too big to be a femme but still quite streamlined. Ratchet moved quickly over to the mech and removed their doorwings, and quick procedure that along Ratchet to stop the energon flow, as he slowly rolled the mech onto his back the red chevron glowed eerily from the street lamp light that had manage to come down the alley. Jazz now had a sick feeling in his tanks as his optics rolled over the rest of the mech, they grazed over the familiar black and white paintjob, skimming over the Autobot symbol on his chest, up the rather handsome face even if it were etched with pain, and to the dark offline optics but jazz knew when those optics where online they would be a light shade of blue. His fuel pump stuttered and a grasp left his lips, Codejack rested a soothing hand onto his shoulder strut, but Jazz was too numb to feel it. He wanted to run to the mech's side and beg for him to stay in this realm, to stay with him. But his tanks rolled uncomfortably causing him to lean away and purge his tanks as his old mentor rubbed his back struts soothingly as he continued to purge up his own energon. _

_After he had finished purging and shivering, he stepped nearer to Ratchet and almost smiled when he heard the regular creative cursing. He cleared his airways slightly hoping Ratchet would answer the question he needed to know._

"_Will he be alright?" Jazz was proud to say there wasn't even a wobble in his voice, though he didn't understand how he was still standing. Ratchet looked up at the young Autobot and smiled inwardly at the fidgeting mess the usual calm bot had become. But this was a serious incident they were currently at, and smiling probably wasn't the best idea. _

"_He will heal." He signed, but Codejack raised an optic ridge which was his way of asking 'and what else?' "But I am unsure of his Processor or if his spark could take the strain. He has only been in his adult frame for a couple of vorns from what I can see, and that puts enough strain on the spark just by transferring it into his new frame. He will need a lot of support and counselling. Pray to Primus he has a strong spark." Both the mechs nodded and help Ratchet transport the injured bot into his cab, Jazz followed silently behind him. He would tell Blaster to go on without him, he was needed elsewhere. _

_Jazz didn't leave the Medbay for 17 orns straight while the rape victim was still in stasis, he recharge on the berth next to his, and all his friends brought him some energon to refuel with but every invitation was turned down he refused to leave the Medbay till he knew the mech inside was okay. _

_On the 19__th__ Orn Smokescreen arrived, he walked though the Medbay doors with a datapad in his servo whilst chewing on the end of his stylus. He immediately stopped when he saw his patient he stared for an astroseconds before he walked straight back out again. Next time Jazz heard of Smokescreen was when Blaster came to visit him, and told him of the blue doorwinged mech that had got himself put in the brig for nearly deactivating the prisoner Jazz had brought in for Rape._

_A solar cycle after the event, Jazz had given up all hope that the mech lying before him would awaken. Slowly he stood with coolant verging on his optics, he brushed the back of his servo other the other cheek and began to walk away. Vowing from day forth to always wear his visor to hide such intense emotion his optics couldn't he didn't want the rest of the crew and bots on base to think he was weak because one mech had broken his happy exterior. Nor would he allow any other bot touch his spark the way that mech had, and even though he wasn't awake to know Jazz had kept his promise to him. _

"_Jazz?" a weak voice question, quicker than any bot could had managed, Jazz whipped around to the berth. There struggling to come out of stasis lock was a sight that brought Jazz intense joy. He made it. He had come back. Swiftly Jazz made it over to the berth and took the others servo in his._

"_Mah here, Prowler."_


	3. Midnight Dark: Chapter 2

******Warnings:** there will be slash, dont like dont read. also volience and rape.

**disclaimer:** I don't own transformers i just hurt them

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**Midnight Dark: Chapter two:**

Jazz stayed by Prowl's side for the rest of the Orn, the next time he came about from stasis he was groggy and not 100% aware of his surroundings. He flinched and turned away when Jazz laid a soothing servo on his arm, and he didn't turn his helm back round when Jazz gently called his name. But, that was one of the easier Orns; others were not so kind especially, when there was no release from his nightmare that had become his life in recharge.

One orn when Prowl was coming out of another fitful recharge, and Jazz was on duty, Ratchet had come near to the distressed Mech to offer comfort from the nightmare. However, the med-bay was in darkness, and to Prowl a looming figure in the dark took him back to the night and he did the only thing that felt natural to him: he attacked Ratchet. Luckily another Autobot happen to be passing, Ironhide, and with Ratchet's help he managed to sedate the disturbed mech. Prowl wished to be removed from the Med-bay after that incident, but his demand was refused because Ratchet refuse to release him from his care in his unstable mental state. So, he was retained in the med-bay as he could not override he command only being a junior Tactician.

When Smokescreen was finally released from the brig, he ran straight up to the med-bay to see his baby brother. Prowl was in recharge when he arrived there, so he simply pulled up the vacant chair to his brother's bedside and waited for him to wake back up. Jazz wished he wasn't there for the brother's reunion, because as he watched as Prowl wake up and see his older brother there with him, he fell apart at the seams. Prowl clung to his brother desperately to which Smokescreen hugged back just as desperate, and when the black and white started to sob Jazz knew he would never forget that broken sound as it tore out his own spark with the cries. Needless to say Jazz didn't recharge at all that night, for the echo of the screams and sobs echoed though his processor.

The next orn, Jazz went to visit Prowl after his shift he was done. Smokescreen had taken him off base and back to the place they lived after their family home had been burnt to the ground, they had gone back to Praxus for Prowl to have a chance at healing while feeling comfortable. While Jazz waited for the return of the two Mechs, the orns turned into cycles which turned into Stella cycles and they still didn't return. The hope that Jazz had held onto was being to fade, but he still prayed for Prowl despite the fact he wasn't an overly religious mech but after having Codejack for a mentor you kinda pick up habits.

It had been 5 Stella cycles, 2 Cycles, 3 Orns, 9 Joors, and 52 Astroseconds (= 5 months, 2weeks, 3 days,9 hours, and 52 seconds), since Jazz had found the Med-bay empty and they pair had returned from their self imposed exile of healing, and Jazz couldn't be happier to known the sparkling he had saved was whole again. but little did everyone else know, he was far from being whole. In fact Jazz's nightmare was about to get worse.

**A/N:** sorry for the shortness, it's kinda like a sewing the two chapters together...kind of


	4. Midnight Dark: Chapter 3

Warning:

Slash, swearing, and hints of rape.

**disclaimer:** I don't own transformers i just hurt them

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**Midnight Dark: Chapter 3:**

Prowl would not look Jazz in the optics, he was so ashamed about what he had found out. He couldn't let Jazz know, he would be disgusted, he would hate him. Smokescreen, being the supportive and loving elder brother he is, stayed by his side. He was always there, even when: he screamed though the night; cried like an overly frighten sparkling stayed trapped in one his nightmares and reacted violently to his brother trying to wake him; all the times he purged and told him just to end his life. Yes, ever strong Smokescreen. But Jazz could not know. But Prowl needed him to stay with him.

Smokescreen guided his brother into the med-bay, Jazz had left their side a few corridors back, to which he was glad. For the news they were about to receive, which he was 86.3% confident he was right about, he was not sure how the fellow black and white would react. They didn't have to wait long before two blurs zoomed past them and straight under one of the berths, and Ratchet following with a wrench in his hand.

"Sunstreaker! Sideswipe! Get out of there now!" The only reply he got were two pairs of blue glowing optics narrowing. "I said NOW! Or so help me Primus, I'll take your paints _and_ video games! I'm going to count to three… one…two….two and a half…" Slowly the two younglings crawled out of their hiding place. The red youngling had a 'This-is-me-trying-to-be-innocent.' smile, that was just to devious to actually pull of that trick. The golden yellow youngling was pouting ever so slightly (not that anyone would tell him that…to his face.) and a dark scowl across his features. They came to stand in front of Ratchet who had his fist balled on his hips glared down at the younglings.

"What do you have to say for yourselves? Hmmm, Sunstreaker?" The golden one glared back defiantly, before pointing at his brother.

"It was that glitch invested idiots fault! I told him it was a bloody stupid idea, but there was no way in hell I was going to let him loose with my paints! Do you know how_ bad_ he is at art? There was no way I was going to let him do an artistic prank, when there is nothing artistic about him! If he does a prank he should at least do it with class!"

"Enough Sunstreaker! Your paints will be confiscated for a cycle! And you will help your brother clean up the mess you created!"

"A whole cycle! That is so unfair!" whilst Sunstreaker continued to rant about the unfairness about the whole situation, Sideswipe was taking hesitate steps away form the two fuming mechs hoping to escape the punishments. He stopped his movements when Ratchet threaten to make it two cycles, which just made his twin fume more. Glad his twin was distracting Ratchet, he was so close to the door so close to freedom.

"Hold it right there Sideswipe!" Busted. "Where do you think you are going?"

"To…um…start with the cleaning. The quicker I get it done, the sooner I can think on my actions and what wrong I have done." He smiled unrepentantly at the medic, who was immune to such things.

"You are to help clean up the mess, and your video games are to be confiscated for two Cycles! Now out!"

"Awwwww, but…."

"OUT!" and they ran for it.

It was then Ratchet turned to the brothers, their optics were wide and curious. He signed, he loved his twins, but they were a handful. Sideswipe was to curious for his own good, and Sunstreaker seemed to have the anger problems bigger that him and Ironhide combined! But they had good sparks. Prowl watched the twins go with sad longing in his optics, oh how he wished for those days back. So he could be carefree and happy, not a care n the world. But now he realised how cold and cruel the world really is, and more than ever he felt scared and alone.

"Right, after looking over the scans you brother sent me, I'm afraid to tell you he was right in his assumptions. The only decision you have to make now Prowl, is whether or not you would like to keep the sparkling?"

Nothing would be the same again.

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Prowl didn't know where he was going, he ignore the calls from Ratchet to come back, he walked numbly though the base. He thoughts crashed against his emotions, it was making his head hurt. The corridor was starting to feel unbearable, he started to feel like he was suffocating. Then the panic set in, he was drowning, he needed to get out. Before his optics the world around him became dark and misty, his fear fuelled his panic. Hyperventilating , scared, and confused, Prowl ran and he didn't stop.

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Mechs moved out the way when Prowl ran by in his blind panic, his emotions plastered across his faceplates matching the tears of energon and coolant. The looks of sympathy followed after him, everybody knew what had happen but none could comfort him and say they knew how it felt. Because deep down none of them the true torment that the young mech was going though. They didn't know he humiliation, the pain, how unclean you truly feel. No one understood what he as truly going though.

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It was nearing the end of the recharge cycle and Jazz was just making his way back from the dancing clubs he liked to go to, nothing like some upbeat music to get the systems all revved up and loose. Out of his speakers he played a softer tunes as he floated back to base, swaying softly to the music. Lost in his music and thoughts.

Looking back on it, Jazz would never be sure how he manage to avoid hitting the mech that was laying slumped in the middle of the road, but he didn't care when he realised it was Prowl. The mech was not hurt, but the remains of his tears of his faceplates. Gently Jazz ran his hand over his faceplates wiping away the tear stains, smiling softly when Prowl leaned into the caress. Reluctantly, Jazz pulled his hand away, he wasn't allowed to touch because Prowl wasn't his to touch.

Signing heavily he picked up the mech and headed back to base, luckily hardly anyone was about, but unfortunately it meant he had no idea where Prowl's quarters were and he would take back to his. Smokescreen wasn't even helpful to his cause.

_-Flashback-_

_:: Hey Smokey, Ah found ya brother where do ya wan' 'im? :: Jazz._

_:: oh right, I had wondered where he had disappeared too. :: Smokescreen._

_:: yeah well…Are you gunna come get 'im? :: Jazz._

_:: I'm sure you can handle him back to his room. :: Smokescreen._

_:: sure…Where the frag are they? :: Jazz._

_:: where all the others are. :: Smokescreen._

_:: well that's helpful.:: Jazz._

_::Glad I could help, but I got a game to play now. Good luck Jazz:: Smokescreen._

_-end of flashback-_

So Jazz prepared for a long night of recharging on the sofa.

Prowl sat straight up from his nightmare breathing heavily, he rubbed a hand over his optics reminding himself that it was just a ream an that he was safe now. Stretching all the kinks out of his body, he surveyed the room with dimly lit optics. That when he realise he was not in his room, this one had more personal effects that Prowl just didn't keep that much; there was a huge music collection across four shelves, ranging form everything he could name; there was a desk and computer and a small sofa that had another mech curled up on it. Prowl decided that what he just told himself was a lie, he wasn't safe at all….he had been Bot knapped!

Immediately his battled computer gave him over a hundred ways to get out of here, with or without the mech on the sofa waking and attempting to stop him. However, what his battle computer hadn't anticipated was the mech soft was calling for him.

"Prowl, are you okay?" the soft musical voice could only belong to Jazz, since he had never heard a voice quite like Jazz's it was truly unique. Prowl not answering obviously concerned the other black and white since he was soon standing in front of the doorwinger, concern in his visor his hand tenderly cupping his face forcing him to look into his visor.

"Come on Prowler, had a bad dream?" Prowl bit into his bottom lip in a vain attempt to stop it from trembling, he felt torn between telling him or not. Smokescreen had encourage to speak about his dreams to help him come to terms with what he had been though, yet Prowl wasn't sure about telling Jazz, what if he walked away? Prowl wasn't sure he could handle it if Jazz walked out of his life. Almost sensing his confusion within; Jazz pulled him over to the berth where he tugged him down next to him, wrapping his arms around the doorwinged mech he sang him a lullaby that his mother used to sing to him. Prowl allowed the music to flow over him, while Jazz's singing made him relax into his arms. He shut of the optics and breathed a heavy sign, the song was encouraging and gave him hope to be strong. So he told Jazz everything, absolutely everything.

"It's okay Prowler ma 'ere, the dark days are over now. We can get though this." That was all Prowl ever needed to hear, and Jazz kept singing for him.

_So stand in the rain, _

_Stand your ground,_

_Stand up when it's all crashing down._

_You stand though the pain,_

_You won't drown,_

_And one day, what's lost can be found._

_You stand in the rain._

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_**A/N:**_ Thanks to everyone that reviewed etc etc. I love you guys! Erm, not really happy with this chapter but I hope you like it!

The song at the end is _'Stand in the rain' by Superchick_, it's a great song really it really kinda gave me teh idea of what Prowl might be feeling. So yeah, that's it form me! I'll update soon!


	5. Midnight Dark: Chapter 4

**Midnight Dark: Chapter 4:**

Prowl purged again, leaving his tanks completely empty and his intakes heaving. He was still so torn up on the inside; whilst his nightmares have faded and he had come to terms with what had happen to him, yet he knew he couldn't end an innocent life but at the same time could he really deal with knowing how the sparkling came about. The thoughts churned his own tanks but with nothing left to purge up he dry heaved, whilst he thought about how miserable his life had become.

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Smokescreen had seen it all coming really, being a psychologist and all, but he still had no idea how to deal with it. He had seen how non-energised his brother was, and though he didn't want to admit it he had seen the small weldings in some obscure places on his protoform. To say the least it was quite frightening to watch his baby brother to have to go though this ordeal where he was of every little help and couldn't just make it go away like usual, in fact he couldn't really do anything but be there for him whilst watching and waiting. Yet, he was finding it harder and harder to just wait and watch his brother slowly kill himself with his indecision, so he rayed so some primus damned miracle to happen.

* * *

Prowl smiled at his brother as he handed him an energon cube, not that he really wanted to have it, but he put on the happy pretence for his brother. Still, it something that was always done between the brothers on this orn every cycle, just before recharge ( not that Prowl did a lot of that either!). Prowl just hoped his brother wouldn't linger for to long, as he was unsure on how long he could keep this energon down. He listen as Smokescreen prattled on about primus knew what, whilst his tanks churned sluggishly, and then flip altogether as Smokescreen brought up the topic he had absolute no desire to speak about. To anyone.

"So, have you made your decision yet? You do know that the date is soon arriving?" Oh yes, Prowl knew only all too well really, but he silently shook his head in answer not trusting the energon to come purging out if he open his mouth plates. But still Smokescreen continued like he had never stopped. "Yes well, it is a delicate subject to talk about let alone make a decision on. I mean you've got the Moral side of killing an innocent-not-even-born-yet-sparkling, or the emotional and mental damage it could cause you if you have to keep the sparkling. Primus knows you're already suffering enough at the hands of that monsters but to know how the child came to be and remembering that night every time you gazed at the one you should love more that the planet itself. It really is a hard decision to make, so what are you views on it?"

_It was official,_ Prowl thought, _My brother is an Idiot! He really knows how to make you feel better…not._

"Prowl?" Smokescreen asked in concern when he received no answer to his question, he leaned forward to shake his arm a little but jumped back rather quickly when Prowl began to purge. Yet Prowl seem to have enough wits about to wonder how his brother managed to move that fast, until he was lost in his misery and purging. When the dry heaving turn to choked out sobs Smokescreen moved to comfort his brother as he told what he had done to himself and the sparkling the last few orns where he had lost self respect and control (his words) to telling him about the decision.

"I can't do this Smokey, I really can't! I don't want to have a child only to resent the very thing that caused them to be alive, I don't want to regret it! The sparkling doesn't need to feel unloved , unwanted, like its only there cause I pity the poor thing! I refuse to allow Ratchet to terminate the cycle either! Cause that goes against the morals of all that we are fighting for! An innocent life should be allowed to choose its right to live or die and to be happy! And I have no idea what to do and how to go about it! You know what the worse part is? I don't care, cause I feel so lost and confused, like someone has dropped me into some dark dreadful maze and I just can't find my way out! I hate this!"

"I hate it too, Prowl. But we'll find a way out, cause there is one. There always is, you have just got have faith a little bit longer. After all, you've still got me!" Smokescreen finished giving his brother his most disarming charming smile that Prowl saw straight through.

"Primus hates me." he said dryly that caused Smokescreen to laugh.

"You and me both brother, you and me both."

* * *

Prowl stood outside of Ratchet's domain finalising everything in his head and weighing up very possibility, his logic centre was going to fry if he carried on like this. Everything was looping round his making him more and more nervous, for today was judgement day. Whilst he had sort of made up his decision on what to do he had a nagging feeling that was another way, he knew the light at the end of the tunnel was near but how near he wanted to know. The questions ran though his head adding to the loop: Was this really the only way? Was he making the right choice? Will he regret it later? The seeds of doubt were starting to plant themselves firmly in his CPU and they grew with each click he stood there waiting in front of the doors. He didn't want to be the one who made this choice, he wanted someone else to come along and tell him exactly what he was going to do whether he liked it or not. Fortunately for him, Primus answered his silent prayers though he was not aware of them until they stood right next to him taking his servo into a soft yet firm hold. Making his heart stutter and keeping him firmly in this reality.

"Ah heard about ya little problem, and ah think ah came up with ah solution fer ya." Prowl turned and looked cocking and eyebrow ridge, silently asking him to continue. Jazz still didn't look at him, keeping his gaze fixed on the doors in front of them. "Keep da lil' un, ya'll hate yaself if ya don't, but give 'im to ah family that can love 'im in a way ya might not be able at. Tis just ah thought." Prowl nodded thoughtfully, thinking though this new information, deciding on the best course of action. Reluctantly Jazz pulled his servo free from Prowl's after a quick squeeze of reassurance, whilst the black and white doorwinger watched him leave.

"Thank you Jazz." Prowl said softly, making the saboteur turn around with a sad thought of smile on his face, their optics meeting (though Jazz's visor) for the first time since Jazz took his hand they sizzled with their overwhelming emotions that were barely contain and kept in control.

"Ah will always be 'ere fer ya…Ma friend." The last of his sentence sounded empty and stained to both him and Prowl, their sparks were aching with each step apart. They both knew how much they wanted to be more then friends., yet neither had the courage to come forth and say what both their sparks were screaming at them to do. So they played this game and they danced the dance, never truly happy nor content but giving each other the strength to get though another day.

Primus has a sick sense of humour like that.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay, I'm sorry it's short and it took a long time to write but I had major writers block! But that's over and I had a burst of creativeness …sort of. So please tell me what you think! Thanks for those who have reviewed and added it etc, hugs! Oh and i have also changed the titles, because its going to be a mixture of little stories...you'll be able to see it better later =)


	6. Midnight Dark: Epilogue

**Disclaimer:** yeah, I don't own anything but the plot.

* * *

**Midnight Dark: Epilogue:**

Prowl woke with his head nestles on Jazz's lap extremely content, except for his rumbling tanks for his little hungry sparkling. However, Prowl was cosy and warm and had no desire move from his spot at that moment, beside his energon levels had only _just_ dropped below 90%. So instead he snuggled deeper into the warm plating below and hummed the sparkling back to sleep before he started reminiscence the last few months.

Jazz and Smokescreen had not left him alone for one click of the orn, together they worked around Prowl, their duties, and having time to themselves, therefore someone was always with him. Him and Jazz, had found a lovely couple willing to take on the sparkling when it emerged, whilst Smokescreen help Ratchet and Wheeljack get supplied and ready for the emergence day. The small group of mechs were busy all of the time, while the rest of the base watched on in amusement and confusion.

2Sentinel Prime, who was currently running the Iaconian base, was a huge help and offered his service quite dedicatedly. Yet most importantly was that he understood, and never asked too many uncomfortable questions. Prowl couldn't count the number of conversation he had with Prime, when he didn't his shadows lurking around him, they talked about everything and anything or they played a tactical game. Talking as normal mechs would, like they were friends not commander and soldier.

But as the emergence da due closer, Prowl began to realise the more and more time Jazz had to spend with him, not that he was complaining in fact it made him almost insanely happy.

* * *

Jazz was whistling a jaunty tune as he made his way to see Kup, his new mentor, the mech was the ace in what Jazz wanted to specialise in and with recommendations from Codejack he got his new mentor. The green mech was boxy and bulky, like most older frames, which left Jazz wondering how he could move so primus damn quietly and swiftly. He was a damn mystery, and Jazz was envious of that. Still when he reached the office, he rapped his knuckles on the door and waited for the deep rumble to allow him to enter.

* * *

Prowl was in the rec room when it finally happen, it was a sharp searing pan though his spark. Though at any other time he would have found the look on his brother face hysterical when he slumped forward, if the pain wasn't so intense. Smokescreen, who at last had realised what was happening, scooped up his brother and ran for the Med-bay leaving a group of astound mechs in their wake.

* * *

Jazz was trying to pay attention to what Kup was saying, really he was, but he had a feeling that something wasn't right. Plus, all what Kup was telling him was stuff he already knew, things like: what was expected of him; his training; specialise areas; missions, etc etc. Now they were heading to Prime's office for some reason or other, when his sensitive audios picked up on an out of place sound. He amped up his audios to their highest range, that when he heard it a scream which was filled with agony. He knew that voice in any pitch or emotion, he froze in the corridor and consider how much trouble he was about to get into for this stunt. Kup had stop when he realise there was no one beside him, so lost in his own story he was telling, and raised an eyebrow ridge to silent ask why he had stopped. But when another cry reached Jazz, all thought stop when his promise came rushing back to him and he sped into action towards the Med-bay and trouble.

"Prowler." He whispered hoarsely as he spirited away, down three flights of stairs and along several corridors until he barged into the Med-bay.

* * *

Ratchet was slightly impressed by the amount of cursing the young tactician was coming out with, though his elder brother looked slightly shocked, proud and sheepish by them. Ratchet guessed that some of the colourful words had been overheard by the younger and that the young one didn't curse that much, however the medics thoughts were interrupted by another long line of swear words.

"Argh! That pit-spawn slagger and his damnable spike! I hope the unmaker devours it himself, though he'll spit it out cause of the vile taste of the fragging slagger!" Stifling a smile, Ratchet looked down at his valve again to check the progress, there was still awhile yet till the full emergence and poor Smokescreen already looked like he needed a new servo.

Ratchet could now see the head was about to about to emerge, he started everyone into position and as he about to lock the doors Jazz came barging though.

"Prowler?" he cried as he stumbled in

"Jazz get the frag out of here!" Ratchet yelled.

"Bout time you slagging got here!" Smokescreen said in pained relief.

"ARGH!" Prowl scream added to the noise, whilst stopping a whole argument erupting. Jazz moved swiftly to his side replacing Smokescreen, who gladly shifted while messaging his servo as he walked round to Prowls other side.

"Com' on Prowler, ah know ya can do it." Though the whole Emergence and pain, Jazz levelled Prowl and kept him with them as he scream and really wanted to get it to stop, but Jazz just kept talking to him and held his servo with the occasional input of Smokescreen. All his efforts were awarded with a loud cry as the sparkling finally emerge, Wheeljack took the small one to clean them and check if they were good to go to his new parents. Prowl looked on completely exhausted, yet stony face.

Once the sparkling was told he was fit to leave, his new loving parents took him away without further hassle. They had asked if Prowl wanted to name the sparkling, it was after al his, but he denied wanting absolutely nothing to do the sparkling. As Prowl settled into a healing recharge, Jazz went to clean up and report to his superiors that he ran from, and he knew it wasn't going to pretty.

* * *

A few hours later Jazz was leaving Prime's office with a heavier heart than he went in with, he rubbed his faceplates tiredly and retreated down the corridor. His usual light and soft steps, were heavy and loud as they echoed after him just another reminder of what he was about tot do.

When he got to the Med-bay he found Smokescreen, Ratchet, and Wheeljack sharing cubes if high grade to celebrate the successful emergence, but Prowl had been taken back to his room for comfort as he recovered. However when Jazz finally reached his room, he received no answer t his soft knocks, concluding that Prowl was already recharging he hacked into his door and let himself in. He was right, Prowl was curled up into a tight ball on his berth deep in recharge, a picture of pure innocence. Jazz was content to watch him for a while until a comm from Kup reminded him that it was time, he leaned down and kissed Prowl's forehead before turning his back and leaving.

* * *

It was the next orn, when Prowl asked Smokescreen where Jazz was, because he hadn't seen him since the emergence of the sparkling mech. Smokescreen couldn't look his brother in the optics until he had control of what he was feeling, however he couldn't keep them completely off his faceplates. Disappointment and sadness lingered there, and that concerned Prowl.

"He's gone Prowl." Prowl stared at his brother as a long time, before nodding slightly and softly asking his brother to leave, which he did without argument. It wasn't until Prowl was 100% sure Smokescreen wasn't hovering outside his door anymore, he let out a choked sob, with was followed by another until his optic coolant leaked down his cheeks. He couldn't handled the amount of emotions running for his systems, the grief that was racking his body. His CPU screamed about all the right choices he had made, and he had made the right choices for the sparkling, but he now felt empty inside and he hated it, there should be a sparkling with him. He should be the one holding him and loving him, he was such a bad carrier, what kind of mech gives away their child to complete strangers. Eager to change his line of thought before he drown himself in regret, they change instantly to Jazz. How could he have left without a goodbye, without a note, without…anything. He didn't care, Prowl decided, he really didn't and he was a promise breaking lair! That's when Prowl spark broke under all his grief for the sparkling and Jazz, eventually he fell into an uneasy recharge. Outside his room, Smokescreen wiped away a few tears of his own listening to Prowl's cries and questions. He looked down at the letter in his servo that Jazz has given him to give to Prowl when he woke, he continued to stare at it even though e could hear his brother calling for Jazz in his sleep, deciding then he tucked it away into his subspace. No one would know.

* * *

**A/N: **Well that was the end of Midnight Dark, hope you enjoy it. I kinda like the darker side of Smokescreen at the end there, don't know why. Anyway, next is about Jazz, and where he went and how he copes with the separation…=)


	7. Sober: Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** yeah still don't own it!

* * *

**Sober: Chapter 1:**

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

_No new messages._

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

_No new messages._

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

_No new messages._

Jazz signed as he checked his messages again and again, actually he didn't stop. His CPU was running out of reasons for Prowl not to have contracted him by now, and this was making Jazz extremely nervous and Jazz really didn't like being anxious. Had he really screw this up? Did he jump in too soon? Had he misread Prowl entirely? His shoulders sagging in defeat, he turned and sulked off to his comm duty, which would be followed by training and some patrol giving him little time to think about the other black and white.

* * *

It had been Stella cycles since Jazz had left, and still he had had no response from Prowl at all, but this didn't sit well with Jazz, and it was making him tense and a little upset. Blaster, a long term friend of Jazz's, saw though all his smiles to see the pain that lurked under there, so like any good friend he planned to put a real smile onto his face and he knew just how to do that.

* * *

He took Jazz out to a club with lively up beat music, the moment the both had free time which he had coincidentally planned to happen. So, here he was dragging Jazz to the club, yes dragging the mech who loved to dance and music above everything. Within the club the lively upbeat was turned up so high it was surprising mechs and femmes had their audios on whilst they bumped and grinded against the nearest bot to them, and the high grade was flowing more easily than the energon in their lines but they were happy and cheerful and Jazz envy them.

* * *

However, he didn't have time to envy too long soon his dour mood was lifting and his feet were starting to move to the music, and maybe he had a bit of high grade to make him more happy. Joors later, the two bots were still going, they were bumping and grinding with everyone else drinking way too much high grade and were happy. By the time the club was closing the pair were still on high, with music coming out of heir speakers and giggling loudly to themselves they staggered back to the base.

"thanks fer tonight man, ah needed that!" Jazz said as they reached their separate recharge rooms.

"Naw man, ya needed that. Mah ya bro, tis want we do." They shared a 'manly' man hug and went into their rooms, once Jazz was in his rooms he realise they were cold and empty and more importantly silent…he didn't like the silence, but he wad too numb form the high grade to actually care. But as he slumped forward on his berth a solution to his came to him in CPU, when he drank high grade he was too numb to feel anything but good whilst his duty and training left him too tired too anything but tired, so _logical_ drinking high grade when not on duty or training would cure him of the pain. So with that plan in his CPU he drifted off to recharge as happy as an overcharged clown. But if only he knew, how bad that plan really was.

* * *

**A/N: **Hmmm, well that's the start for Jazz's little trouble, oh and will it cause trouble. It's short again, I'm sorry. I'm starting to think I'm not happy unless I'm hurting these two…oh well, it's fun! Thanks for all the reviews etc. they are great encouragement. =)


	8. Sober: Epilogue

**Disclaimer:** yeah still don't own it!

* * *

**Sober: Epilogue:**

_Vorns later…_

Jazz waltzed down the corridors, he had just finish reporting his very hard and very successful mission into high Decepticon area, he had manage to gather lots f important information that would be able to help the Autobots and also remove some key personal without to much notice either. So, since he was now secluded for some orns off, it would only be fair to have a party to celebrate such an achievement and a party did require some half decent high grade. Just what he needed.

* * *

Blaster's optics followed Jazz around the room whilst the party was in full swing, he had watched his life long friend drink high grade cube after cube, and he was starting to worry. Since Jazz had been moved to this base, Blaster could see the change in him, the scariest was the amount he drank when he was not on duty. Jazz had told him once, it made him feel so good cause he was numb form the pain, it was a feeling he couldn't have sober. (A/N: Can you see the irony of this chapter title?) Blaster himself couldn't understand what he meant and it worried him to think that Jazz needed to drink he amount he did, and being a good friend he had tried to weed him away from it, but nothing was helping, so in the end he unhappily accepted this part of Jazz but made a promise to be with him and to watch him when ever he drank; because one night he was convinced that he would die of Energon poisoning from the amount of drink he consumed.

Little did Blaster know, tonight would be the night that he collapsed.

* * *

The communication trainee sat beside Jazz's berth side, waiting for the small black and white to reawaken. It had taken the medic 5 Joors to pump Jazz's tank to access energon, and another 3 Joors for the rest to leave his lines, and to say the red mech was worried was an huge understatement. He was due to start his shift soon, but he was reluctant to leave Jazz's side even though the medic advised him some air would do him some good. Luckily, the saboteur slowly online his optics locking them with his friends.

"Never again Jazz." Blaster said softly choking back a sob.

"Never again." Jazz agreed readily.

* * *

After Blaster had left Kup had come to see his trainee, first he grumbled about how young ones not be able to handle their high grade then to tell his student about his young days…there were a lot of them! When Jazz fell into a restless recharge, Kup went to a medic to ask him how long Jazz would be out for.

"Quite awhile, after some therapy and help, he might be more stable to handle his work." the old medic replied quite ready for the mentor's question.

"I don't understand, Therapy? What for?" Kup asked in a hushed whisper.

"You don't know?" Kup gave him the 'well-what-do-you-think' look. "Young Jazz has been abusing his system with over dose of high grade for Vorns, his collapse was caused by built up energon poisoning in his systems."

"I knew Jazz liked his High grade, but I…I never thought he'd…Primus."

"Kup, I'm sorry. It's hard to see really, mechs who imbibe to much high grade and get a small amount of energon poisoning have upset tanks; they would usually come to a medic and we'd sort it."

"I know that." Having to have done that too many time to count, more now in his old age.

"However, Jazz never came to us to drain it while it was still a small amount, it steadily built up at the bottom of his tanks, clogging up his main energon filter therefore not allowing pure enough energon to pass his lines. In result, he stressed his lines to much and therefore collapsed." Kup could do nothing but stare at his student, his golden student. He was the prefect Saboteur, with a drinking problem it would seem.

When Jazz woke again, Kup was still by his side but he wore such a sad and disappointing look, that's when Jazz knew that Kup knew his dirty little secret. That look hurt Jazz deep, and the pain in his chest increased double fold as he sobered up more and more, and he knew in that moment he want to sink back into that peaceful bliss that only high grade could bring that he had promised Blaster he would do never again.

"Do you remember when I told you about my later mate?" Jazz could vaguely remember something but it was all foggy, it must have been told to him recently since it was the more personal part to Kup that he rarely told anyone. However, before he could answer Kup shook his helm reading the expression on the silver faceplates. "No, you don't. Just how much do you remember of the last few Vorns Jazz? I can image that its not a lot beside your duty, missions, and a lot of high grade! How could you been so stupid!" and on he raged to his student, lecturing him until his audios burned. None of it really affected Jazz until Kup said in a soft voice.

"I had such high hopes for you, I thought you'd be the one not to disappoint me." With those words something within Jazz stirred to life, something he had not felt in a long time. Determination, determination to make things better again. But then again, determination means little if you don't have the hope to accomplish your goal in the end.

* * *

Blaster visited again after his shift long after Kup had gone, this had left Joors for the black and white to fight with his thoughts and feelings. When Blaster sat down, the pair remain quite for a long time, until Jazz started to speak.

"It's a safe place, it doesn't hurt. It's my protection" he spoke quietly, Blaster said nothing to encourage him to speak, knowing his friend will say everything to him in his own time in his own way.

"I have to fill the silence, the quiet scares me cause it screams the truth."

"It whispers to me softly 'come and play'."

"I know I'm the only one blame." when Jazz said no more, Blaster hugged his friend close when the choke sobs came out of his vocaliser.

"I'm here for you Jazz you can do it, I know you can."

So with his new found hope, Jazz's determination flared even more to life. But it dulled against his fear, since he had no more courage to conquer it.

* * *

When Jazz woke the day he was due to be released from the med bay, he was immediately looking into sad curious baby blue optics on a yellow youngling. (guess who?) The youngling leaned back when he saw the optics online of his current cushion, and regarded him curiously.

"Big bot say your broken in here." Pointing on his chest to were his spark laid, the bold remark suddenly brought the day in the med bay with the arguing twins with Ratchet. "IS that true?"

"Sunstreaker?" Jazz said evenly.

"Is that true?" He raised his voice, his tone was tinged with desperation.

"Ya, ma spark feels broken."

"Then you understand?" Jazz shook his head, he had no idea where Sunstreaker was going with this. "You can feel the emptiness there, cause he is not around! I can't feel him, he's not here!" Pointing to his chest. "nor can I hear him in here!" Pointing to his head, the anger and sadness fuelled his desperation making Jazz's spark feel for its broken comrade. "It feels cold and empty, like something missing, all it's doing is causing you pain and you need a way to numb it before it kills you. I know how it feels. I can't feel sides, and it feels like I've lost him forever. I feel scared that I have lost him." he was speaking softly again. " When we are separate I try to remember our good memories and how he feels in my spark. But sometimes my fear turns them into bad memories." Sunstreaker had retreated into himself, like he was trying to fight off his fear now looking into those hazy blue optics. Awhile later after some silence, he appeared cheerful again. "But fear is like the Decepticons, if you don't confront and offline it straight away, it grows and grows and takes over eventually until you face it. But I'm not scared of Decepticons, cause I've got heroes like you Jazz to help me face them, like my fears." Jazz sat there staring shocked at the pure innocent and bravery of this youngling, and reminded him exactly why he was fighting this war. For love, hope, freedom, and to live without fear. The Black and White gathered the youngling close.

"I'm always here for you Sunny, whenever you need me." He said aloud, and in his head ended with _cause you've given me the courage to conquer my fears._ Sunstreaker gave him a bright smile and clambered down, and starting walking towards the doors. However he stopped turned round, when he got back he picked up a package and gave it to Jazz.

It was a collage of pictures, drawn by Sunstreaker, it was of the mechs of femmes of the Autobot army, paired; laughing; relaxing; having fun; his favourite was him and Prowl sharing a cube of energon in the rec room when the mechs were in recharge. They had relaxed looks on their faceplates, slightly smiling, content in each others presence, like the couple they would never be. Even though his spark ached at that thought, the warm feeling the picture gave overwhelmed it, and Jazz realised he really could feel that good sober.

* * *

**A/N: O**kay, that's the end of Sober, I didn't want Jazz to suffer, I mean he is Jazz! And I know Sunstreaker was out of character, but he still young, he still has time to grow into his vain, over bearing, protecting, mean ways! But we all still love him! Well, I do…=) so I hope you liked it, and I love everyone who has reviewed, favourite, and story what-ya-ma-call-it! You keep me going! And anyone who can guess when I use actual lyrics to a song and which song and artist can have a cyber cookie and choose if Prowl gets the letter or not….hmmm?


	9. The Trouble with Love is: Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** yeah still don't own it!

**The trouble with love is: Chapter 1:**

Jazz thought his new mission was going to be easy, to spy on suspected Autobot traitors and Decepticon spies, he thought it was underestimating his skills just a tiny bit. None the less, he accepted his mission, anyway to get back into Kup's good books since the therapy was now over. He was going to pose as an a weapons trainee of Ironhide's, luckily for Jazz; him and Ironhide went way back to Academy before the war, so at least he would have someone he knew going back into a mission. He was going to be a dark brown bulky framed mech called Catapult, he was from Polyhex and was transferred to Ironhide supervision for further training. A nice neat cover up, nothing could go wrong.

Oh, he was so wrong!

* * *

Jazz hated this frame with a passion! Its was chunky, bulky, and made way to much noise! But for his mission he kept his grumbling to himself and Ironhide, thankfully though in his quarters he was free to move about in his own frame. So far he had uncovered 3 traitors of the Autobots in the last 9 bases, so he was feeling quite confident going to the next base. It was a large base, so they were spending more time there to be completely sure everyone was fully checked out, not that Jazz minded.

Jazz gazed at the Iaconian base as it emerged as they crested a slight incline, and his breathe was stolen away. Sure, he had seen the base many times, but in the sunlight, the crystals and metals blended and glowed together screaming about the power and wealth of the city. It was a sight to behold, and it felt like home.

* * *

"So Jazz, What do ya wanna do?" Ironhide in his usual gruff voice. Jazz tilted his head to the side, and said in a rather bored voice,

"Whatcha think?" While his visor lit up in playful light.

"Rec room it is then." Was the short reply, the rest of the way was just exchanging idle chat and gossip. When the reached the rec room, it was busy as per usual at any time of the orn. Ironhide gathered up some mechs that he new so he could introduce Jazz to them, not that Jazz was paying them any mind as he checked them all out though the Hub. Once that was over with, he glanced the Rec room over, it was decorated for Primus day ( A/N: Yeah Cybertorian Christmas) that was quickly approaching. Deciding he wasn't really needed at the table, he excused himself to some energon.

On his way to the dispenser he spotted at two of the suspected five in the Iaconian base, and he also saw some of his close friends he used to have: Blaster; Trailbreaker; Hound; Moonracer; Arcee; and Smokescreen. His optics lingered the longest on Smokescreen, the Praxus mech seemed calm and relaxed like usual so different form his younger brother; but that was a completely different trail of thought that Jazz wasn't sure he wanted to delve into, but his processor was already heading down it. So lost in his own thoughts he bumped into another mech of the base, both were hastily apologising till Jazz looked at the mech properly and his main pump just stopped. There he was, tall; proud…cold, yet still so beautiful. Everything seemed to fade into the back ground as their optics met though the visor, Prowl peered closely into that visor; that insanely unique and yet emotional visor could only belong to…

"Jazz?" he whispered the name like a prayer that should not be heard, relief and panic surged in Jazz's lines. Luckily he was saved form another mech, unfortunately it was by a slim dark and purple mech that was on Jazz's suspect list. The top of it. Oilslick, once a rich merchant that cargoes everything, for the right place. He was suspected to have helped with some arm dealing before the war started with a dodgy mech called Swindle. That was enough for Jazz to not trust him, but the way he had his helm designed to shade his optics, made Jazz think he had something to hide. The dark mech slid an arm possessively around Prowl's waist, and glared at Jazz.

"Ready to go?" Without waiting for Prowl's answer dragged him away, a mixture of dark emotions flared within Jazz as he watched them go.

He didn't just not trust Oilslick, he wanted to string him up. Cause no matter what, Prowl was his.

* * *

A few Joors later late in the recharge cycle, after removing off his disguise Jazz sat at one of the instruments they kept on base, his emotions were still ugly, focused on self hate and pity; a bit numb; and he felt the undying need to cry out how much of a failure he had been to Prowl. He placed his servos onto the keys in front of him, posed ready to play, but he let them drop back into his lap with a heavy sign. He usually turned to music when he was mad and upset, but he never felt this helpless and as much as a failure, what music could he create with this kind of feeling. Rolling his shoulders, he sat back up form his slouch; placing his servos again he hit a few keys, but it still felt wrong. This time he kept his servos on the keys and let his head drop back his optics offline.

Unknown to Jazz, just within the shadows Prowl stood watching him with desperate optics, hoping he would play a song.

"Come on Jazz, please." he said so softly would wouldn't of heard him unless you were stood right in front of him. Meanwhile, Jazz let go of all the tension in his body and let instinct take over him. Keeping his optics offline, the first few soft tones left the instrument and soon his voice joined in wavering in his emotions.

_It's coming on Christmas_

_They're cutting down trees_

_They're putting reindeer_

_And singing songs of joy and peace_

_Oh I wish I had a river _

_That I could skate away on_

_But it don't snow here_

_Stays pretty green_

_I'm going to make a lot of money_

_Then I'm quit this crazy scene_

_Oh I wish I had a river _

_That I could skate away on_

_I wish I had a river so long_

_I would teach my feet to fly_

_Oh I wish I had a river _

_That I could skate away on_

_I made my baby cry_

Prowl felt the coolant surge to his optics but he tried hard not to let them fall, but Jazz's voice was so sad and lost. He couldn't help but feel the emotion as well.

_He tried so hard to help me_

_You know, he put me at ease_

_He loved me so naughty_

_Made me weak in the knees_

_Oh I wish I had a river _

_That I could skate away on_

_I'm so hard to handle_

_I'm selfish and sad_

_Now I've gone and lost the best baby_

_That I've ever had_

_Oh I wish I had a river _

_That I could skate away on_

_I wish I had a river so long_

_I would teach my feet to fly_

_Oh I wish I had a river _

_That I could skate away on_

_I made my baby say goodbye_

_It's coming on Christmas_

_They're cutting down trees_

_They're putting reindeer_

_And singing songs of joy and peace_

_Oh I wish I had a river _

_That I could skate away on_

Prowl had long given up on his ability to keep his coolant in his optics instead they flowed so freely down his cheek arches, but not wanting to let Jazz see him so weak he fled away, disappearing without a sound in the shadows. Jazz felt better for the musical relief, his soul didn't feel so weighed down and he could now carry on with the mission which he felt was going to fail before. Gathering his thoughts together he made his way to leave, but someone stopped him.

"What the hell are _you_ doing here?"

* * *

**A/N: **okay, horrid cliff-hanger, I do apologise, also for how long it has been since I last posted, I must admit I had n idea how to write the next short story, since I did decide it was time they saw each other again and cause more emotional distress for the pair of them. Anyway I hope you liked it, and thank you to all my lovely reviewers and those who have alerted the story or even favourite this story! You guys keep this story going!

Anyway the song is not mine, not who owns the original I think Joni Mitchell, but I like the one done by Robert Downing Jr. who I seemed to think would suit Jazz perfectly for this song. It's called River. Plus, I know it has stuff about Christmas and Cybertorians don't have it, but image he is singing about Primus day! I, Myself couldn't think of what they would cut down, so I left it how it was. Anyway why would I want to destroy such a good song as it is?

Anyway please review!Oh, and Merry Christmas!


	10. The Trouble with Love is: Chapter 2

_Disclaimer:__** yeah still don't own it!**_

* * *

**The trouble with love is: Chapter 2:**

Prowl wasn't quite sure how long he had been running from the room for, but he had realised that he was no longer near Jazz or his room but instead found himself outside Oilslick's quarters. Breathing rather hard he raised his fist to knock politely for entrance, but in the end decided against it, after all it was rather late and he did have a early start tomorrow. Turning around to return to his own rooms, he found that now he had slowed his own pace, thoughts were running clearer though his CPU.

With this rather disorienting thoughts circling around he couldn't actually find a reason why he felt drawn to Oilslick to begin with, he just thought the way you couldn't really see his optics had a mysterious air around him like he knew something he didn't yet other than that the mech really had redeeming features what so ever. Prowl cursed himself for not seeing though to that, but Jazz's sudden (in disguised) appearance seemed to have shredded new light onto the forlorn relationship he had fallen into.

Then there was Jazz himself, well that was just a topic the black and white try to avoid like a case of cosmic rust, and very well failing to do so. Even just one look into the visor of his, his fuel pump had picked up a pace, energon turned in his tanks, and his fans had stalled. Prowl wasn't quite sure he liked these certain outcomes, that seem to sprung upon him every time he just thinks about the fragging mech. It would be most embarrassing to spot him in battle and for that to happen, but he probably wouldn't have to long to think about that cause a momentarily lapse of concentration and he would be dead. Not to add to the fact all these feelings that Jazz makes him feel just confuses him further, Logically he should steer clear of Jazz since he walked out of his life after bringing a new life into the world, yet he spark surged with delight and urged him to go after him and just be with him for the rest of his life.

But, now that was the real question: How did he choose between his CPU and Spark?

* * *

Jazz still stood in front of the other mech, not saying anything as the words grinded to a halt in his vocal processors. The mech separated from the shadows to reveal rather angry over protective Smokescreen, who looked less than pleased to see him so soon, or alive. Smokescreens doorwings flared up behind him, showing that he was more than mad Jazz hadn't answered his question.

"I'm going to ask again, what the hell are you going here?" The repressed angry and hatred was so clear in his voice, and his calm blue optics had turned an unusual icy blue.

"Ma 'ere at blow off sum steam." Jazz replied in his usual relaxed manner, glad that smokescreen hadn't picked up the tension in his voice or structure.

"Well leave, your not needed here anymore!"

"Ah already seen that." Smokescreen just gave him a look that Jazz couldn't place, before he started to walk away from the saboteur who had torn out his brothers spark. "Does 'e treat 'im right?" Those soft words stopped the red and blue mech in his tracks, it was a hard answer. Oilslick seemed to treat him fine and all, but Prowl never seemed happy or even content in his presence. Smokescreen trained in such behaviour reading really didn't get what was going on, so instead of sharing his confusion he lashed out verbally to the all ready down-trodden mech,

"Well, he hasn't built up all his hopes and dreams and just left him in the gutter I suppose with just a flimsy note, like some people I know." The small black and white flinched and with a withering glare Smokescreen left before another word could be said.

* * *

Ironhide whistled as Jazz dragged himself into their shared quarters as the recharge cycle began to close. His paint was scuffed and scratched; his frame was heavily dented and his visor half dimmed down from the lack of energy in him. The red mech watched as his friend stumbled over to his berth and just flopped down, visor off and a trail off energon behind him. Alarmed by his friends state his comm. Ratchet to get to there ASAP, and that it was strictly confidential.

Whilst waiting for the doc bot to arrive to treat the smaller mech, Ironhide desperately tried to get some information out of him. But the black and white just stared at the wall, visor dimmed and vocaliser off. Ratchet threw an impressive fit to say the least, best one in about 437 years Ironhide guessed. While Ironhide was enjoying the show, Ratchet was concerned about the lack of any response from the saboteur who would wave him off and say he is fine before escaping the Med bay. His silence was disconcerting for the medic, so as a last resort he kicked out Ironhide to concern Jazz to get him to talk to him.

"Jazz, what happen?" He said in an unusually calm voice, since he was not really known for a nice bedside manner, should have gotten a reaction out of him but he only stared at the same spot. After several more tries at trying to prod some reaction out of him, finally giving up he got up gathered up his tools and left after ordering Jazz to rest for the next day. Failure crept up Ratchet's back strut at not being able to determine what was wrong with Jazz, but he fully felt it when he heard a soft sob escape the saboteur as the door started to close.

* * *

Jazz stayed in his quarters for several orns after Ratchet's visit, he refused to move from his curled up position on his berth and even refused to refuel. Extremely concerned for his friends condition contacted Ratchet, who subsequently contacted Kup, and well that started a few nicely chosen cuss words that impressed Ratchet and the arrangement of Kup's arrival the next orn.

When Kup finally arrived he was rushed off at once to Jazz, despite being disrespectful to Prime who was there to greet him, needless to say the only accomplishment he achieved was that he finally got Jazz to have some energon. But that was it but it was a start, and Ratchet was happy with even the smallest of success.

After two orns, Prime finally had an appearance greeted his old friend and asked after the situation. Prime was concerned about his warrior and the state he was in, and more concern for the unknown reason for it. So the four mechs came to an agreement, if he didn't improve soon they would move him to another base, even if they had to drug him against his will to be moved.

* * *

"Prowl, was is that?" Smokescreen asked his little brother when he looked up from his card game he was playing, staring at the abrasive on his brother neck that surrounded a small cut to his energon line.

"What it what, Smokescreen?" The red and blue mech stared at him in shock, did his brother just give him attitude for being concerned for him?

"That mark on your neck! And your doorwing! What happen to you?" Prowl shifted uncomfortable on his feet at his brothers observation, Smokescreen knew that movement as one he used when he was unsure what to say.

"I fell." The words slipped smoothly out of his mouth like a well practiced lie, abandoning his game that he was winning (losing a large amount of credits, in doing so.) to hold his brothers face in between his servos.

"Prowl..?" The younger stuttered his optics and drew in a large breathe, then looked his brother in the optics and repeated what he just said. Signing quietly to himself, he stepped back and gestured toward the door.

"Come on, I'll take you to see Ratchet." Prowl hesitated looking very uncertain in his own way, before he could answer however Oilslick warmed an arm around his waist and smiled at Smokescreen.

"I'll take him, after all you shouldn't leave your winning game." Smokescreen narrowed his optics, Prowl was more tense then before Oilslick had turned up. Sensing his hesitation Oilslick quickly added. "I swear I'll take him right there, since I'm heading that way anyway. My word as an Autobot." Finally the elder brother relented, but felt disturbed as he watched Prowl's defeated figures trudge away with the other.

* * *

The group of mechs had seen no other way, they had to get Jazz out of here. There was no improvement, he only refuelled when Kup ordered him to but the rest of the time he just stared at the wall. They faith was quickly turning into despair as the orns passed, but luckily for them hope came late one recharge cycle in a very unsuspecting form.

When the door chime went off Ironhide answered it, very surprised to see the door winged mech in he entrance. They stood there for a full minute, refusing entry since Jazz was in the room along with Kup, Ratchet and Prime.

"Where is Jazz?" he asked in a calm tone of voice, Ironhide was unsure how to answer the question since no one was suppose to know he was here to begin with.

"Ah don't know…" Ironhide began.

"Cut the cyber bull slag, I know he is here and need to talk to him. It's urgent." Ironhide went though a visible mental struggle. In the end he allowed the other to step though, when he caught the sight of Jazz pitiful mess he signed heavily. Squaring his shoulders he approached the berth, swallowing his pride he started his request.

"Jazz, I need your help." The Saboteur shocked to hear Smokescreen's voice, jerk to turned towards him. "It's about Prowl." Now, that caught his attention but that quickly turned to anger.

"Why ta pit wud ya need meh to 'elp 'im? 'e got Oilslick at do ta fer 'im! 'e can go get slagged fer all ah care! Ya too!" He spat back at the red and blue mech, who really didn't appreciate the gesture. Before any of the stunned audience could go anything, Smokescreen landed a painful hit on the back of Jazz's helm.

"Right! You listen to me! I came here to ask you're help with Prowl, the mech you supposedly love, and you don't care? Are you really that self centre you slagging glitch? Do you really only care about your hurt? Prowl is hurting, and not just emotionally! I had to send him to Ratchet today to be fixed up, and on top of that the slag head is lying to me! To me! His brother! Now I need your help, because I can not get though to him, only you can! So get your head out of your arse and help him! He needs you!" breathing rather rapidly after that out burst he sat to the floor. " You're his only hope."

"Wha 'bout Oilslick?" Smokescreen's face harden at the name, making Jazz more and more interesting.

"If you are my friend, you would considered this. If you love Prowl, you would do it without hesitation." They stared at each other for a long time daring the other to break the gaze, but Ratchet got both their attention when he cleared his intakes.

"Prowl never came to the Med bay today." After that statement chaos erupted in the small room.

* * *

**A/N:** Well, another chapter down, What did you think about that one? Have I confused anyone yet? Anyway, I hope you like it, frustrated the hell out of me to write it. Think I rewrote about 3 times! Stupid thing! Kinda please the way it turned out, never less please tell me what you think!

Thank you to my reviews and alerters, seriously without you I would of given up by now!

Also, Lithium223 …if your still reading this could you personal message me, thanks!

That's all =)


	11. The Trouble with Love is: Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**The Trouble with Love is: Chapter 3:**

When the chaos had finally died down, Ratchet carefully explained to the small group of mechs that Prowl really hadn't turned up to the Med Bay that orn, in fact he hadn't seen him for a few orns now. That sparked fear inside of Smokescreen's chest plates, because that meant something was desperately wrong with his little brother and big brothers have to protect their little brothers.

Jazz on the other hand, was plotting the most painful and slow way to kill Oilslick, a way that would put Shockwave to shame and his treatment seem nice. Yes, Jazz is an Autobot but he was also a special ops mech, and that require a darker side to deal with the thing they see and do. Now, a slagger had gone and messed with that one bot that was closest to his spark, and that just wouldn't do.

Silence now filled the small space in which they were all gathered in, and Sentinel Prime said the one thing that was all on their processors in the most un-prime like way.

"Well, where the frag is he then?"

oOo

Prowl was locked in his brothers quarters waiting for him to come back, and knowing he wouldn't be looked for here. It was somewhere he always felt safe, wanted, protected and loved. Though it seemed strange, but Prowl was very young for his position, but most bots didn't see pass his serious expression to his youth and fragile insides. They didn't see the times when he broke down when their words finally got the best of him; when Jazz had walked away; seen what he had gone though in his life to make him so distant and serious. Then, a mech who had taken the time to see pass all of that after Jazz was gone, was just slagging using him cause he was secretly a Decepticon! To top it all of he had to continue to give them information if he wanted Smokescreen to still be online, cause he accidently found out what was going on. So, everyone could just frag off, because he was having a stupidly bad orn, and he just wanted to break down and cry till he felt numb.

Yet that was not going to happen, because his logic chips where telling him how unpractical that was and his duty to be an untouchable cold spark aft held them back. So he just settled with gazing around his brothers' room, and really the familiarity of it wrap around him like a blanket. Yet looking back on the moment Prowl would never be able to tell you why he picked up that datapad: it didn't stand out; wasn't another color; it obviously hadn't been used in a while; maybe it was just fate; but he picked up _that_ datapad.

Prowl honestly didn't know what to think let alone feel, but if he didn't get answers soon his logic chips were going to crash. He was happy because knew that Jazz just hadn't got up and left and there was a reason for his leaving; and he loved him; he was angry at his brother for being an over protective slagger! Primus, he could take care of himself; Jazz loved him; sadness, just how many tears had he cried over Jazz, all of that could've been prevented; Jazz loved him; and he was confused, why did he never get that datapad? Oh, did he mention that Jazz loved him?

Well, fate and Primus really was on his side today, just as he went to find his brother to get some truths from him he waltzes though the door; very shocked to find his brother there. At first all Prowl wanted to do was find his brother and talk to him, but with him in front of him and all that past pain in his chest, he did the only thing natural to a hurting mech. He punched him square in the jaw, taken completely by surprise Smokescreen tumbled back into the open door way and though it.

"What the Pit Prowl? What is wrong with you?" He spluttered from his position on the floor and a servo came up to inspect the damage done. Thankfully there was no damage done, but it still hurt like the pit.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Smokescreen looked confused at his younger brother; he couldn't think of anything recently that he had done. Nope, nothing came to mind. Seeing that his brother obviously didn't understand what he was trying to say, then the realization dawn when he spied the datapad in his brother's servos. Damn. Prowl saw it as well, double damn.

"What the hell were you thinking? Yes, I understand that you are my brother, Mr. Protector, but I have been old enough to make my decision for so long. Why did you take that choice away from me? It could have saved so much hurt and pain, if you just let me choose what I wanted to do." Smokescreen suddenly found the floor a very interesting place to look, as the fight drained out of the black and white in front of him. Leaning against the wall, mindful of his doorwings, he slid down the wall until he was sitting down. Both set of optics were firmly settled on the floor, both lost in their own thoughts.

"I was trying to protect you." Optics locked across the hallway. "You were so hurt with the whole ordeal with the sparkling, and I thought it was fine I give you a few orns to calm down. But then I got to your rooms, and I could hear you. Your spark breaking sobs, as if someone was trying to dig out your spark, I just couldn't do it Prowl. I wanted to save you some of the pain, never once did it cross my processor that it would cause you more pain. I never want to hurt you like that again, I know now it was the wrong thing to do. You needed his words of comfort and love, it something I could never give to you."

"You do Smokescreen, and you're forgiven. I'm sorry for hitting you, but I was just so angry! –"

"Well, you got your point across." The brothers shared a small chuckle at the red and blue's mumbling. Just to make sure the air between them was cleared, Prowl lightly kicked his brother in the leg. The other doorwinger gave his brother an incredulous look, as the other gave him a small sly smile. Smokescreen returned the gesture with a look that just spoke of a challenge, one Prowl would gladly accept.

Ratchet really didn't know what to think when he wondered down a corridor, to come across the two doorwingers in the middle of a poking and kicking fight, laughing merrily amongst them. Despite for being known as a hard aft medic, Ratchet watched them for an astrosecond longer before taking another corridor, let the children play before the war came back a knocking on their doors.

oOo

Jazz meanwhile was not having the same fun as the brothers, but was enjoying himself as his watched the mech in front of him squirm within his bonds. The catch and the struggling had been so easy that Jazz was actually disappointed, well the slagger must of knew what was coming for him. He slowly and purposely removed the blank visor that was not allowing Oilslick to see where he was taken, but not that there was much to be seen in the near completely black room. Jazz himself was deep in a dark corner where you could not see any part of him; Oilslick in his near panic attack had lost all common sense to turn on his scanners or his night vision. Not that would work.

"Do ya know assaultin' ah officer can result in sum heavy brig time?" The voice seemed to come from all over the place, not given the traitor any time to pin point where the mech was in the room. He knew there was another mech in here because he could sense them, and this scared him more than anything.

"I-I don't know what you are talking about." A flash of white was the only warning he got before he was struck across the face, he didn't see his attacker before he was merged with the shadows again.

"Wrong answer." A cold shiver worked the way down Oilslick's spin struts, that voice was so dark and menacing.

"Wha did ya think? Tha bots wouldn't notice wha had happen ta Prowl?"

"I really have no idea!" This time he didn't even see the attack, just the pain in his jaw. Yup, that was dislocated.

"Fool!" This time he saw the flash of white, before the flare of pain on his upper left cheek arch. When his visor finally returned to him, he was faced with a pair of white glowing optics. If the pure hatred and need to kill didn't seem to radiate of this bot, he would have been attractive. What was he thinking, he was about to be complete destroyed and he is thinking how good looking the mech in front of him was. Almost reading his thoughts, the mech optics narrowed even further in disgust.

"Ya gunna start tellin' meh tha truth, cause ma tha bot they call when ya need bots ta disappear and neva come back. Ah can make ya disappear foreva. So ya gunna tell meh tha truth, or am ah gunna make Shockwave seem like Prime." Oilslick could tell that this mech meant business and that was no idle threat, he would actual pull through with it. Then it dawn on him, the mech in front of him was special ops, the mechs that borderline Decepticon. The one that did the dirty work for the Autobots, and he had seen some of their work, and he wasn't too keen on being on the receiving end of it. So, he sang like a bird, telling them everything, even down to the point that he was a traitor.

"Well now, tha wasn't too hard now was it?" Oilslick just hung his head in shame. "Unluckily fer ya though, we can simply let traitor go. They just disappear." Tears of pure fear escaped the dark mech's optics, but Jazz felt no pity or sympathy for him what so ever. He was a traitor, and they deserved no pity.

oOo

After the 'mature' spark to spark with Smokescreen, Prowl felt sure he knew everything was going to turn out all right now. He knew Smokescreen would not be an easy mech to take away from him without screaming the place down like a femme (oh the mental image tehe), so he didn't really understand what he was so afraid of. On top of that he felt like he could go and talk to Jazz, since Smokescreen said that he was here, but first he had to deal with Oilslick. Well at least he tried to but the mech had disappeared, and no one had any idea where he had gone. However Prowl got a pretty good idea what had happen to the mech when he came across Jazz and Mirage drinking High grade in the rec room, looking a bit too smug to be innocent. Well, that high grade, turned into the party of the century, one that Jazz and Prowl didn't attend to.

oOo

Outside the base, the two black and whites walked along side by side, not touching but close enough. They stopped when they were far enough away from the base to have privacy but still feel safe from any attacks, not that they were likely to happen, neither said anything for a while until Jazz broke the silence.

"Smokey told meh; ah understand why ah neva heard anythin' from ya now." Prowl nodded slightly, he really wanted to say something but he gotten get the words pass his vocalizer. Jazz saved him from saying anything though; by pulling him into a tight embrace which Prowl never wanted to leave ever again. Because this is where he belonged, it was home for him. Somewhere he was safe and protected, and more importantly than anything else it was where he was loved. Unconditionally loved and where he gave just as much in return. In that moment, the war didn't exist; there were no fractions; no hatred or killings; it was just them and the stars. That was all they would ever need.

oOo

**A/N:** Well, I'm not always mean to them! They need some loving! So Prowl finally got the datapad and well you read above…so anyway thanks to all my reviewers, subscribers, favs etc etc! you guys are fab! Cookies for all!

Oh, and does anyone want to beta this story I know my grammar is not great, no matter how many times I re-read it, I just don't see them…so if you wanna let me know! Thanks again…don't forget to hit the review button…I like constructive criticism ;)


	12. The Trouble with Love is: Epilogue

**Disclaimer:** Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**The Trouble with Love is: Epilogue:**

Prowl snuggled further into the warm metal under him, he really didn't want to get up now despite the fact he had a patrol in a breem. Jazz's warm body was a much more appealing place to stay then to attend the boring patrol, however duty called and Jazz was waking up now.

"Mornin' Prowler." He murmured, he slept quite deeply after the mission he had just been on, what surprised Prowl by the trust Jazz put in him, after all special ops are known to be the ones to sleep so lightly movement outside their door could wake them up and the fact they never go into a deep recharge.

"Good morning Jazz." Both were in no hurry to move from their rather comfortable position, if Prowl wasn't such a stickler for rules and duty they would of spent a most of the morning in the berth just basking in each other. When they did finally leave Prowl's quarters they walked servo in servo to get their energon, which made the twins pull faces at them and say 'ewww' but they were still young. So by mid-morning Prowl was on patrol with Ironhide and Jazz was on comms. with Blaster, all was right with the world. Who were they kidding? They were in the middle of a war, not a very destructive war at the moment, but a war non-the-less.

oOo

:: Ironhide ta base! We need back up A.S.A.P! Prowl is down, with severe head injuries! Medical assistance needed! :: Ironhide.

:: Ironhide, this is Prime, we are sending reinforcements. Retreat to safe distance, Ratchet is on his way. :: Prime.

:: We've got seekers! Starscream is here…what the frag was that? Prime, they have got new weapon! Primus! Come on! I'll take you all on! :: Ironhide.

:: Ironhide! Stand down! That's an order! Retreat to a safe distance and protect Prowl, ETA is 4 breems. I repeat stand down! :: Prime.

:: Reluctantly acknowledged Prime. Ironhide out. :: Ironhide.

oOo

Jazz's hand sped across the comms. unit with Blaster transmitting and acknowledging parts of the battle they were not a part of. Prowl had a head injury; Ratchet was cursing up a storm; Ironhide was laughing at him and being trigger happy with his new updated cannons; Prime was directing the battle; and Jazz was extremely pissed not to be at Prowl side, but glad to have the comms. to know what was happening at least.

A Joor later the weary troops were stumbling in back to base, Ratchet rushed Prowl straight into surgery with Wheeljack at his heels, whilst the timid young medic-in-training, First Aid, had to deal with the onslaught of wounded mechs. Cliffjumper, a hot headed new recruit, had lost an arm to Thundercracker; which the twins were playing with. Shocker, an older green mech, had several of his energon lines silt. Apparently, it was only meant to be a small skirmish but Starscream's ego and pride took a battering which made him call in reinforcements, which lead to a minor battle. Luckily, Prowl was the only major Injury, but that was what was upsetting Jazz the most.

Outside the Med Bay, Smokescreen was slouched up against one wall watching as Jazz paced in front of the doors, Prowl was still in surgery for most of the orn and no one had been able to give an update on how he was. It was driving them crazy. Luckily, Prime had relieved them of their duties for the next orn only, considering what had happen. That and Smokescreen had thrown a full blown fit when Ironhide came to collect him for a patrol, which almost ended in brig time for the Blue and red mech.

It wasn't till half way through the next orn when Ratchet finally emerged from his liar, and by the look on his face plates the news was anything but prefect. The red and white medic tiredly gestured for the other two to enter, he weaved them passed the now empty berths away from the ICU, where Prowl was, and towards Ratchet's office. Once they were all settled with a cube of energon, Ratchet brought up a hologram of Prowl's CPU to help demonstrate his point.

"Prowl took heavy damage to this part of his CPU, as you can see it mainly his memory core and also his Central emotional Input core, but likewise his battle computer got damaged. That's one reason the operation took so long, the battle computer is very delicate and if one wire is out of place it could cause more harm than good. I'm not 100% sure on the extent of the damage to his memory or emotional core; we'll have to wait until then." The medic paused, waiting for his audience to digest what he was saying and the impact of the words into their CPU's.

"The tricky part was the EIC (Emotional Input Core), I had to rewire it though the battle computer, because of some difficulties we had, and I honestly don't know what will happen when he wakes up. CPU injuries are very difficult to deal with and the outcome we don't know about until the patient wakes up, so I really do suggest you brace yourselves for when he does come back to the world of the living, because Prowl may be himself or he could be. Now, go get some recharge and I will comm. you when he wakes up. So get out of my med bay, whilst I report this all to Prime." The pair nodded absent mindedly, before scattering away from the Med Bay.

oOo

It took nearly nine orns for Prowl to naturally wake up after his severe injuries; Ratchet did a quick overview on his health and gave him a cube of energon before allowing in Smokescreen. Luckily, Prowl remembered his brother, greeted him with luke-warmness and talked in an almost monotone that was unusual for him. There was a slight disturbance when the earliest Prowl could recall was just leaving academy before he was even raped. That concerned both Smokescreen and Ratchet, what happen to all those vorns, those life defining moments that made Prowl, well Prowl. Then Smokescreen had a thought, if he didn't remember those Vorns, did he even remember Jazz?

Their worst fears were confirmed when Prowl and Jazz came face to face with Smokescreen and Ratchet supervising, it was a bad end to a bad few orns. Jazz had waltzed in and straight away hugged Prowl, who just stiffen in his arms and asked in a cold voice.

"Who are you?" Sadly Jazz could do nothing but walk away, away from his partner who couldn't even remember him and all the things they had done together; and Jazz would be lying if he didn't say it didn't feel like someone had just stabbed him several times in the chest and pulled out his spark. It hurt, it hurt like the pit.

oOo

Ratchet was gathering his notes and going over all the statistics of Prowl and his all over health, he was on his way to Prime for his final report on the accident and Prowl's overall state of mind. Regardless to say, it was not looking all that positive to submit. He had lost several vorns of his life, including some terrors of his past and some cherish memories; he had become slowly very cold and untouchable emotionally, since the battle computer took the emotions as useless and dumped them before they could become fully processed; leading on from that, that caused him to crashed from illogically problems and events; he had become a better tactician now, because he didn't place feelings with bots making all plans unbiased; unfortunately they had also lost Jazz. They had no idea where he was, no comm., no message, nothing. Kup was due to leave in a few orns, so a message was sent to the small black and white of his next base and his time of arrival including his route, should he want to go there.

As he was describing all this, he yet again had a hologram of Prowl with the overlay of his medical scans, giving Prime a visual of hiss soldier and hiss current state.

"…yet can you see that slight stress on his spark," Ratchet commented as he switched slides to the doorwinger's spark without even looking he carried on. "As you can see the statistics are fluctuating. That is a sign of…" Prime stared concerned at his CMO, who was frowning at the scan and re-reading through his notes.

"Ratchet?" the deep rumble of Prime's voice brought the CMO attention back to the room. "Is there a problem?" A series of expressions crossed the medic's faceplates, before he zoomed into the scan and answered Prime's question.

"Can you see that slight anomaly?" The large blue mech nodded. "That would be another spark, within but separate form his own." Shocked Prime lean forward, and peered closely at the scan.

"Are you saying…?"

"Yes, Prowl is indeed sparked again, and without a doubt with Jazz."

oOo

**A/N:** Firstly, sorry how long it has been! But, I had a major writer's block, and yeah it still kinda sucks…sorry. And please don't kill me, I'm mean to Prowl and Jazz I know!

Thank you to all those that keep this story going with reviews, favs, and alerts! Thank you, cyber cookies to all!

Please review and let me know if you like this one!


	13. Thnx for the Memories: Prologue

**Disclaimer:** Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Thnx for the Memories: Prologue****:**

Smokescreen really just couldn't believe the hard Primus damn luck his brother had, it was like he had a magnet for trouble and it just brewed around him like a bad case of cosmic rust. His memory was all but lost, Jazz had disappeared on a mission, and then the Primus damn slagger was sparked! It made the blue and red bot feel like the dark cloud of acid rain wasn't going to let him go, well not for a very long time. One positive thing, was that Prowl had already shown signs that his memory could very well be recovered, also he had accepted the sparkling much too every one's shock.

He had told them, it was only logically that he was sparked with a sparkling and that it was of consent because there was no post-trauma stress attachment to the sparkling and its creation, or as Ratchet like to say: he wasn't about off throw himself of the planet like last time. They really are charming the pair of them. However, what Smokescreen found most disconcerting was the cold, calm distance that his brother had put between himself and everyone, like there was a huge pipe welded up his aft! It was the most frustrating changes to his brother that was really starting to get to the usually cool gambler, yet the CMO had said it was likely to be permanent so to suck it up and slagging well deal with it like the rest of them.

There were other changes to his brother other than the cold aft attitude, like how everything had to be logically, just plain black and white logic. They had ultimately learned the hard way, by the twins. It was a calm day until the twins had visited Prowl, who was resting quite peacefully in the med bay; Ratchet had turned his back for twenty clicks, and there was a frizzle and a pop and Prowl was on the floor. That day they learned about Prowl's glitch, and that Sunny and Side's innocent face was a major front. Innocent? Smokescreen's aft.

Now that's how they ended up here, back in Praxus for good. Both of them were to become security response officers, and since Prowl wanted to keep the sparkling there would be regular visits from Ratchet and Wheeljack. Prime had expressed his happiness at the decision to keep the sparkling after Prowl had given up his first, and had unsubtly hinted at how much he spoiled this one rotten, much to Prowl's disagreement. The apartment was spacious and well supplied for the sparkling already and Smokescreen had a feeling that the Prime had personally helped. It didn't take long for them to settle in their new daily roles at the station. They met a lot of new bots and some they already knew from their childhood, well Smokescreen's childhood.

It was domesticated, calm, and peaceful. Until Prowl went into emergence, several orns early, in the middle of a lockdown of a major crime scene. Luckily Ratchet was there in Praxus on his way to see Prowl, when it happened. Smokescreen held the small grey sparkling like any proud uncle; it took three joors in a room full of officers, crime lords (that wanted to have a CPU wipe as soon as possible, Prowl had happily declined.), and strangers, but little Bluestreak had arrived in a flurry of activity that would follow him through out his life. Mind you, Prowl and Smokescreen admit, he really did live up to his namesake in those first few nights.

oOo

**Several Vorns later:**

Prowl had regained almost all of his memories. It had been a roller coaster of a ride to get there but he made it, or so he liked to think. But, whenever he looked at his son, he knew there was still something missing; a huge chunk of his life that he couldn't recall and it was all to do with Bluestreak's other creator. It was a swirling mist of emotions with a bot with no face, it was not something he could tell his creation when he asked about his sparker. It hurt, not to be able to tell Bluestreak about him, but to be truthful Prowl wished he could, because he had a feeling Blue's sparker made him feel so fabulous and would have loved Blue like only a creator could.

However, logic stopped all wishful thinking and made him think about what was right for his child that was swiftly growing. Sure enough, Prowl somehow managed to get that stick out of his aft for Bluestreak. Ratchet said it was because of his Parental Controls that over-rode his logic centers, regardless Blue's well fare always came first, then logic, then Smokescreen. Maybe.

"Papa! Papa!" Prowl onlined his optics and pulled himself out of his musing by his son's cries, and the tugging of recharge sheets as the smaller bot crawled on his berth. Pretending to still be sleeping, his small grey creation poked him in a doorwing, making the door twitch. The little one cooed then giggled a little, and poked it again resulting in the same thing. Optics bright and wide, the small hand reached out again, but he was quickly scooped up and wrapped in his Papa's arms. Squealing with delight that would surely wake his uncle up from his late night, Blue snuggled into his Papa's arms and did his best to ignore the bot that was bound to be standing in the doorway.

Bluestreak snuggled into his creator's chest, knowing his uncle would make his way over; slowly his little body began to relax when no such attack came. That was his undoing, as soon as he relaxed he was scooped up by Smokescreen and tickled. Laughing aloud, he tried to squirm away from his uncle's finger tips. After about five minutes of the tickle attack, Smokescreen allowed his nephew to breathe and sit up with a grin that look like it would split his face in two.

"Park!" he exclaimed loudly as he attempted to climb over to his creator again. "Papa, park?" Prowl let out a small smile, while rubbing a servo over Blue's helm.

"Sure Blue, whatever you want."

oOo

Bluestreak squealed at unholy levels (or so Smokescreen thought, as he still trying to get over his hangover.) when they arrived at the park, where a few younglings where playing. Jumping out of Prowl's arms in his excitement, Bluestreak ran off and soon joined a game, while his father and uncle went to sit down and enjoy the pleasant day.

Smokescreen was quite happy watching the younglings running around; since the war had come to an almost full stop, it had been nice and peaceful for about a vorn now. It was a nice, welcomed change to the savages of war, and it gave a chance for Bluestreak to grow up in a good environment. However, Smokescreen was drawn from his musings by a familiar voice, one he hadn't heard in a long while.

"Sideswipe! Sunstreaker! Get your afts back here now!" Ratchet's gruff voice couldn't be mistaken, nor could the gleeful giggles from the twins as they ignored him. The red and gold younglings, who were on the brink of adulthood, ran off to the others in the park.

"I wouldn't bother with them Ratchet, they will come back when they need feeding." Smokescreen called over lazily, making the older spin to face him.

"Ah, Smokescreen, Prowl, long time no see." Moving over to sit with them, better than doing the data pads that he had brought with him, it was nicer to talk to friends than to do work after all. "How is life in Praxus working out for you all then?"

"It's peaceful, quite slow really." Prowl answered, not taking his optics off his creation as he talked. Ratchet followed his gaze till it landed on the small grey Praxian; he was slightly small for his age and still retained the absolute innocence of childhood. Which couldn't be said for the twins, who had seen and witness more of the war than anyone would have liked.

"He has grown, not the same little sparkling that warbled everyone's audios off." Smokescreen allowed a small chuckle to escape his vocaliser; his nephew could still warble for the life of him.

"Oh he still does, just with broken sentences and a few words." Prowl allowed a small smile at the mention of it, getting Blue to be quiet was a mission; he even talked in his sleep. The discussion continued in a familiar fashion, talking about the younglings, work, war, and their old friends. Ratchet told them how Sunstreaker would apprentice to become an artist in the next few orns, whilst Sideswipe would work to become a merchant. The younglings were excited since they would still be kept together, Ratchet said their bond would not allow long term separation or too far of distance.

"They are still too young for it, as they get older they will be able to but the possibility of spark stress is too great at the moment. They're twins, we have to be cautious." Ratchet said. Prowl and Smokescreen saw how Ratchet treated the twin's as his and Wheeljack's (his bondmate) own sparklings and was very over protective of them. As the day worn on 'The terrible trine', as Smokescreen called them, wondered over for some energon before running off to play again.

Later in the day, as they were soon to leave, Prowl wandered off to go get the younglings some energon goodies for being reasonably good. Prowl couldn't count the number of times Sideswipe had been caught doing something he shouldn't; or how Sunstreaker had been shouted at, to put that youngling down. The gold mech had only been protecting Blue from other younglings and he didn't care about being told off, he would just scowl at Ratchet before sulking off.

Bluestreak had been good, he would just get in the middle of the argument that the twins would start and break it up. Bluestreak happened to also be protective of the twins. If any youngling said something mean about the twins, Blue would flare his doorwings into a high 'v' shape and glare at the youngling in question till they backed off. When it first happened Smokescreen had laughed himself into a fit, because apparently he got the 'Prowl's glare of ultimate painful death' down to a tee.

But, other than that, they had been good. This was their treat, and too see each other tomorrow as well, before Ratchet and the twins had to return back to Iacon. After purchasing said treats Prowl started back to the group when he bumped into another mech, a mech with a shiny blue visor. After apologizing, the mech had moved along, but Prowl was rooted on the spot. His vents hitched and stuttered, he could hear energon gushing in his audios, there was unbearable pain in his head. The energon treats fell to the ground as he clutched his head and fell to his knees. Images flew though his CPU that Prowl didn't even know he had.

~Memories~

The blue visor glinted in the light as the mech move towards him; his movements were graceful and full of confidence. His voice was smooth as his name rolled of his tongue, like a silent promise that was full of passion.

oOo

He held his hand as he screamed bloody murder, as he attempted to push the small body out of his. It was slagging painful to bear. But as long as he squeezed his hand that was fine, he could bear it all if he was there.

oOo

He curled further into his berth, crying like there was no tomorrow. But there wasn't any tomorrow, not for him, cause the other half of him was gone. He had left, left him all by himself. He now had to endure all the pain and lonesomeness by himself.

oOo

Bluestreak's doorwings shoot up as he felt a stirring in his spark, his papa was in pain, and he could sense it. But, he could sense something else as well, another rousing in his spark that he didn't know. His baby blue optics gained a wild panic look as he searched for his sire; he spotted him kneeling on the floor surrounded by mechs.

"PAPA!" He ran as fast as his little legs could carry him, he could feel the twins behind him and hear them calling his name; but he didn't care his sire needed him. Pushing past all the legs he finally made his way to his sire, who had his optics tightly shut and Ratchet hovering over him; he was about to make his finally dash to get to him, when he was scooped up by his uncle.

"NO! Want Papa!" he struggled against the strong grip that held him to the blue chest, energon tears started to gather in his optics; he started to warble in distress as his 'adult' words couldn't describe what he was feeling.

"Shh, Blue, Papa is gunna be fine." Smokescreen said as he held on tighter to his brother's creation as he tried to throw himself harder against the restraints.

"Want Papa! No!" He screamed and he pushed against his uncle but to no avail. Tears streamed down his cheek plates, he just needed his papa; he didn't want his Papa to leave him.

:: Hush baby, you're Papa gunna be fine. :: Blue gave a start when the strange feeling in his spark spoke to him, like what Papa did when he was upset. But this wasn't Papa, yet somehow he wasn't afraid.

:: But Papa, no get up. ::

:: He is just tired baby, He'll get up. Just give him time. :: Blue couldn't argue with him, especially with all the love and comfort he was sending him. It was like a warm blanket wrapping around him, making him tired and his optics dimmed with recharge.

:: No go. :: The voice chuckled warmly, making Blue feel a lot better.

:: I'm not going anywhere Baby, I'll always be here for ya. :: The voice was gone, but the warm feeling he created didn't leave. It made him feel so much better, that he fell into recharge and didn't even notice when his Papa took him into his arms and carried him away.

:: Sleep tight my little baby, I'll guard you're dreams. ::

oOo

**Author note:** Yay, another one down, I think this is my longest chapter yet!

Thank you to my lovely new Beta: Foghornleghorn83 3 much love to her!

Also, thank you to all who have reviewed and all the rest! Cyber cookies to all! =)


	14. Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 1:**

That night Prowl kept Blue curled into his body as they recharged. The day had taken a lot out of both of them, emotionally as well as physically. Plus, Prowl didn't want to let go of his creation after the memories started reappearing in his CPU, he never wanted to let him go again. He knew he had scared Smokescreen today. He saw it in his optics as they had walked home, the slight sheen of panic and concern that failed to leave. Yet, Prowl was oddly happy that his brother had been there, and so was Smokescreen. Not that either would admit to it.

Smokescreen, in his concern and panic, had canceled all his plans for the next week and refused to have a single cube of his high grade at home. He knew his brother was okay and fine, but it took a while for him to calm down and remind himself that Prowl was not a child anymore that needed his protection. It hurt to admit that to himself, but he knew that Prowl would come to him with his problems whenever he needed him. That always was a comfort for him, not that he would ever admit that.

The next morning, Prowl was surprised to find Bluestreak still fast asleep on his chest, his intakes were deep and rhythmic while his baby blue optics were offline. Slowly Prowl stood with creation and took him into his room. He laid him down on his berth to allow him to sleep some more before the twins arrived to cause mayhem with the youngling. Affectionately rubbing his helm, Prowl went to get his morning energon and talk too his brother.

What Prowl most admired about his brother, was the way he would avoid talking about a certain subject without you even mentioning that fact. But like all good siblings he would beat out what was wrong at a later time, when little audios couldn't pick up any bad vibes from the elders. Bluestreak had an unnatural ability to pick up on tension and bad vibes between bots. Whatever was going on, he picked up on it and it generally affected his mood throughout the rest of the day.

About a joor later, there was a buzz at the door telling the brothers, Ratchet and the twins had arrived. Remarkably the twins where very sedated in the morning and where acting well behaved. They even gave Prowl a 'Get well soon' card. The picture on front of the card was extraordinary. It was a happy scene from yesterday's trip to the park. Both doorwingers knew that Sunstreaker was going to become an excellent artist.

"I'm afraid to say Blue is still in recharge, completely out of it. You can try getting him out of it but good luck with that. He sleeps like there's no tomorrow." Smokescreen told the twins as they scurried off to the room Prowl pointed at.

"I honestly don't know where he gets it from." Prowl said off-handily, making Ratchet snort into his cube. He knew exactly where Blue got it from; Jazz was murder to wake up when he didn't want to, but Special Ops training drilled it out of him. Plus, Prowl was a right pain in the aft after a crash when trying to awaken him. Seriously with those two as your creators you were going to sleep a lot or not at all.

oOo

:: Sweetspark, you need to wake up. :: The thought trailed into Bluestreak's head and dream, but he was feeling too good to get up just yet.

:: Don't wanna. :: he mumbled back to the presence, that had kept its promise and didn't leave.

:: But baby, your friends are here to see ya. ::

::hmmm, warm. :: He muttered back curling more into his fuzzy blankets, deciding to ignore the voice in favor of more sleep.

:: They brought energon treats, 'M sure your creator will give you some if you wake up. :: _That_ caught Bluestreak's attention.

:: Treats? :: The presence laughed softly as his attention for treats early in the morning.

:: Yup, and they are still warm from the shop. ::

:: Really? :: Bluestreak started to online he could smell the treats wafting into his room, stirring him more awake.

:: Really, really. :: The presence faded to a warm fuzzy feeling in his spark, he slowly online his optics to see another set of icy blue staring intently down at him. Time seemed to slow down in that moment. Optics still locked onto the other, in Blue's CPU a different time and place played like a memory he didn't have.

_~Inside Blue's head~_

_He looked around the war savaged landscape, the battle had been fierce and many mechs and femmes had been killed, he himself had been luckily enough to escape with as little damage as he had. He almost collapsed with relief to see a yellowed framed mech starting towards him, when they stood only an inch apart, the other mech laid an energon stained hand on his cheek and pressed their helms together._

"_Thank Primus your safe." He said in a low voice, causing his icy blue optics to soften just a little._

_~Back to the Room~_

They both came aware of the room once again after what seemed like hours gazing at each other, when it had in fact only been a couple of astroseconds. The moment was lost when Bluestreak sat up and glanced around for his promised treat, warbling in his own sparkling language as he did so. That's when he saw Sideswipe holding the bag full of treats, he looked up to the red twin with big wide eyes,

"May I?" he asked. Unable to resist the Puppy dog eye trick and pout, Sideswipe gave in and gave him three of the treats, which was a huge mistake they learned later on that day. That day Ratchet learn the other reason why he was called Bluestreak, other than his rapid babbling, he was only a grey streak for several joors. By the time he had worn himself out it was late and time for the others to leave.

oOo

Ratchet didn't really know what to think, when he saw Sunstreaker still awake long into the recharge cycle, painting away on a canvas oblivious to everything around him. So, for awhile he just stood and watched the youngling paint, he didn't move until his adoptive creation put aside his brush and paint then stared at the result of his hard work. He moved to stand behind the golden youngling and studied the painting, the pictured battle field shown only two mechs standing so close that their foreheads were touching. Ratchet could see the loving expressions on the mechs' faces, despite the gore that was also painted onto their bodies. Not the usual style Sunny used to paint, which made Ratchet curious.

"This is interesting Sunstreaker, not your usual style." He murmured, the golden refused to look at him, only grunted positively to his observation. His lack of talk surprised Ratchet; while not overly talkative he would usually openly engage in talk about his art. So he tried another tactic.

"Are you not happy with it? I think it looks…expressive." Ratchet said, Sunstreaker was always critical of his work, never truly happy with any finished piece. However the youngling's frown just deepens, still refusing to speak. Slightly concerned, the medic looked at the painting again. He then realized that the bots in the painting, was an older Sunstreaker and what appeared to be an older Bluestreak. Even more baffled, Ratchet could only wait for the twin to open up and explain what was running though his CPU.

"It was strange. It felt like we were looking at each other for hours but it wasn't. Side's says he doesn't know what I am going on about. But I saw it, I never felt so relieved when I saw him alive walking towards me. I know, he saw it too, but he is just a sparkling he wouldn't understand. I'm confused Ratchet, what does it mean?"

"I'm afraid I can't help you there Sunny, because I have no idea what you are talking about." Ratchet slid an arm round the slim shoulder plating, as the golden youngling explained what had happen earlier that day. As he reached the end of the conversation Ratchet had a small smile on his face plates, the trivial troubles of younglings.

"Well Sunstreaker, it means you have a destiny and it will involve little Bluestreak."

"But, how do you know? How will I know? Does Bluestreak know?" Ratchet allowed a small chuckle escape pass his lip plates, making Sunny glare at him with his icy blue optics.

"You won't need to know Sunstreaker, it's fate. Your spark will know when the time is right. But right now, it's time to recharge."

oOo

While Ratchet lead a contented youngling to bed, Prowl was struggling to settle Bluestreak down for recharge. All the extra treats had given him far more energy than usual and not all of it had left his systems yet. After the others had left, Smokescreen had played card games with him, followed by his evening energon, and a bath; three stories later and the grey Praxian still refused to settle down.

Settle in his berth, his fuzzy blankets wrapped around him and his favorite toy tucked under his arm, Bluestreak stared up at his creator with large blue optics. A creator that was very tired and a large processor ache forming between his optics, needless to say a creation that refused to recharge was trying his patience.

"Sleep now Blue." Prowl said in a firm weariness, hoping his child would go to sleep.

"Please papa, song?" His large baby blue optics stared innocently at his creator, making him subject to his request.

"Just one song, then you are going into recharge. Okay?" Bluestreak nodded meekly, snuggling further into his cocoon of blankets. Prowl sang an old Praxian lullaby, one his creators used to sing to him when they were still online. Slowly Bluestreak's optics began to dim down and his systems slowed, a sign that he was falling into recharge fast. When he finally finished the song, Bluestreak was in recharge. He slowly made his way quietly towards the door. He was almost there, when Blue softly called out to him again.

"Papa?" Refusing to move back to his berth, Prowl just looked back to his creation.

"Yes, Bluestreak?" He asked faintly, making Bluestreak pause and hesitate in what he wanted to ask.

"Who is Jazz?"

oOo

**A/N:** Sorry guys on how long it took for me to post this! In fact I'm asking myself why you even put up with how long I take! Well, if you read this far I love you! Cyber cookies!

Thank you to my lovely Beta: FoghornLeghorn83!

So, tell me what you think?


	15. Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 2:

"Who is Jazz?"

Prowl looked back at his creation with confusion written over his usually stoic faceplates. It stirred emotions in him he had never felt before but he couldn't recall who Jazz was.

Blue Visor, killer smile, loving hands, Blue visor.

Bluestreak watched as his father frown, trying to bring up memories he just couldn't remember. His doorwings were quivering, shaking with suppressed emotions.

Blue visor, heartbreaking singing voice, cheeky grin, soft touches, Blue visor.

"I'm sorry Blue, I…I just don't know."

Blue visor, black horns, white paint, Blue visor, Black hands, Blue visor. Blue Visor. Blue Visor.

That was the last he remembered before he crashed.

oOo

Vorns Later:

Bluestreak walked through the crystal gardens. No one was about since it was late in the recharge cycle, as he admired the slightly glowing crystals as he reflected back on his thoughts. He felt contented humming in his spark from both his creators, Prowl was working late again and his other creator was somewhere.

It was that time of the vorn when Bluestreak would ask his carrier about Jazz again and without a doubt he will crash again like he always did. His uncle Smokescreen found it hilarious that Bluestreak made his creator crash this much; the medic was less amused, as was his father. Despite the fact Blue knew his other creator was called Jazz, he knew his carrier couldn't remember and what started as an innocent question had turned into a scheming plan between a sparker and creation.

Though Blue had never actually met his other creator, they spoke often over their spark link. Jazz had told many stories of him and Prowl, things his carrier couldn't recall; when he was younger they were his extra bedtime stories after lights out. Now they were his hope that one day his sparker and carrier would be together again, despite how many times Jazz told him not to hope too much. Regardless, when Bluestreak reached a mature enough age, Jazz told him everything he wanted to know and so began the plan to get Prowl to remember.

He had it all planned out: he was going to go up to his father drag him out of that office; call up Smokescreen; before his uncle arrived ask the fateful question so just as his uncle arrives he can see Prowl crash. Perfectly planned out and timed, even Smokescreen had cleared his social calendar for tonight since he knew what day it was.

However, plans don't always turn out the way you plan them.

oOo

Smokescreen ran up the stairs to his brother's apartment. After talking to Bluestreak that morning they planned out how it would all work out. It would be so perfectly planned that Prowl would be amazed. Quickly tapping in the code for entry, he rushed in ready to record the crash, to find an empty room. Completely devoid of a sparking Prowl and an amused Bluestreak. No one was there.

"Bluestreak, is that you?" Okay, so maybe someone was in. He hesitated a second wondering where Bluestreak was. Moving smoothly over to Prowls office, he leaned against the doorway studying his younger brother for a short while.

"Ah Smokescreen, what brings you here? Is Bluestreak with you?"

"I was just in the area and no, he is not. He's rather late. He is usually home by now." Prowl looked up from his datapad, a concerned frown creasing his forehead.

"You have not seen him today?" Smokescreen shook his head, coming more and more concerned by the astrosecond. Prowl reached across the family bond to Bluestreak to find him in a state of contentment but unable to talk to him.

"Just give him another Joor; I'm sure he has just been held up." Prowl distantly nodded his helm, knowing the probability to Bluestreak forgetting to say he would be late was incredibly slim.

Needless to say, Bluestreak did not come home that night.

oOo

When the brothers entered the Enforcers building the next morning to report for work and a missing child, they were confused by the business of the place. Praxus Law enforcement center was usually peaceful and calm since Praxus had the lowest rate of criminals and offences. The place heaving like this and the tension in the air, told the brothers something had gone down while they were off. Quickly moving, they headed towards their chiefs office. Constable was head of all Praxus law enforcements; the reasonable aged mech had seen it all and done it all. When they reached the tall dark blue mech, they were informed of a criminal had escaped prison not more than an orn ago.

"…he was seen heading towards Praxus at high speeds, but none of our cameras even detected his entry if he has. The criminal in question has been locked up for many vorns; he is a murder and a psychopath. His designation is Swiftkill, which he certainly doesn't allow for his victims to say the least."

"Wait, Swiftkill?" Smokescreen questioned, frown marking his usually relaxed faceplates alerting Prowl that something was very wrong.

"Yes Smokescreen, that Swiftkill. I understand how this affects you." Somewhere deep in his spark, Prowl knew something bad was about to happen.

"That's not the only reason; Bluestreak has been missing for nearly an orn now. We can't contact him, nor can Prowl though the bond." Constable froze for several astroseconds, before turning round to the brothers with a very serious expression on his faceplate.

"Missing?" Smokescreen nodded, concern shining through his optics. Quickly the older mech spun round to his terminal, sending several messages before speaking to all officers.

"All Officers we have a code 1, I repeat a code 1. All information will be forwarded to you. To stations people!" Prowl looked towards his brother completely confused on what was going on, there was not this much fuss for a missing bot. Smokescreen took pity on his younger sibling when it looked like he was about to crash for all the lack of information he was receiving.

"Prowl?" The red and blue mech nudged his brother to get his complete attention. "Swiftkill is the mech our creators took down; he then escaped and was the mech to deactivate our creators. Now I guess he wants to finish his job off by getting to the last mech to affect us all, Bluestreak."

oOo

It was so dark; it was suffocating, dangerous dark. He couldn't see anything passed the dim of his optics, and the silence was oppressing. He had no idea where he was, but all he knew he couldn't use any communications: wherever he was stopped the use of comms and bonds; his vocal processors had been crushed; speakers blown. He was so scared, he didn't know where he was, why he had been taken, nothing. The silence was fueling his scared thoughts, making him curl into a tighter ball of shaking metal. It was also cold, a coldness that sank right into his protoform. It snaked around his frame like the fingers of death preparing to snatch him away back to the well.

The more he was left alone, the more the silence got to him. Thoughts ran in loops in his head, he managed to convince himself that he was not worth saving, because no one loved him and he was useless. No one wanted to love the stone wedged into their peds, the useless annoying thing they carried around with them. They pitied him, they didn't love him. The same destructive thoughts went over and over and over, only ending when his captor came to drag his nightmare into the real world.

oOo

Sentinel Prime considered himself to be a reasonable mech, if not a tad stern most of the times. But when a mech runs off during a shift with no explanation, he becomes rather annoyed. Having an annoyed Prime on you aft wasn't what you wanted. Not when he just had to give mechs to the Praxus enforcers to help catch a criminal. So short on mechs, running off was not the best of ideas ever in his optics at the current moment. Luckily Ironhide had managed to capture said mech before he could escape, after some heavy hinting from Kup on where to find and capture the said mech.

"Waiting for an explanation soldier." He said curtly, patience wearing thinner the more time he spent with the mech. The only response he got was the tightening of the mouthplates, before the shoulder sagged in defeat realizing his bravo was not going to make his life any easier.

"Blue is missing; I can't feel his spark nor talk to him. I'm scared something has happen to him, I need to go and see." Sentinel knew exactly what Jazz was talking about, having read the report, but Kup had said Jazz was not to know anything. He had not long got back from an intense mission, so needless to say his emotions were high and he was so trigger happy he would put Ironhide and Chormia together to shame.

"There is no cause for concern; everything in Praxus is under control." Jazz's visor narrowly and darken dangerously, special ops training on full alert.

"Wha' are ya hiding form meh?" He questioned, Prime knew if he didn't give the answer he wanted nothing would stop the mech from attacking.

"I have nothing to hide from you Jazz, now please returned to your quarters for some well deserve recharge."

"Don't lie ta meh Prime." Optics locked with the almost purple Visor, a battle of wills surging between them.

"I have noth-" Jazz slammed his fist down onto the desk instantly cutting of his leader.

"He is mah son, ah deserve ta know!" Prime signed, and released all the information he knew to his soldier. As he was about to order the mech to stay on base, basic Special ops code that he wouldn't break would make him stay, but the mech was already gone. Prime stared at the empty door way and said the only thing he could in these situations.

"Aww, Slag it!"

oOo

**A/N:** Well, I hope I didn't keep you waiting too long for it this time. And I Promise that things will get better after this little incident, for how long I don't know…they will be a happy ending…It would be mean if I didn't. Thanks for all my reviews, favs, etc…love you all =)

Anyway thanks to my beta: Foghornleghorn83 =)


	16. Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 3:**

"It has been four orns now, I want my child back!" Bots at the enforcers' station stared at Prowl with shocked optics, no one had ever heard him yell before. He was the one that was calm and cold, not hot headed enough to yell at the chief. Smokescreen had not yet made a move to help calm down his brother, instead he hoped this would help with his emotional subroutines that had been suppressed and damaged for many vorns.

"We are doing all we can Prowl. Some Autobots are coming from Polyhex. Prime even said there is a special ops bot coming as well." Smokescreen's optics narrowed at the mention of special ops. If it was Jazz then a whole lot of trouble was about to go down, with him included.

"I don't care if it was Prime himself! I want my child away from that murderer!" Smokescreen moved forward before any more could be said. The tension he had noticed building in Prowl's doorwings was a sign for an impeding crash, which saved the Constable from replying to the distressed mech. He could deal with a fragged off Prowl; a cold one; an annoyed one; but an overly emotional one, he couldn't. Fortunately for Prowl's doorwings, his elder brother managed to catch him as he descended to ground rather fast as he crashed. Smiling rather cheerfully to his commander, the red and blue mech wandered down to the med bay with his unconscious brother in his arms.

oOo

Jazz tore through the landscape like the unmaker himself was behind him, he had long ago taken over the troops heading towards Praxus leaving them to trail in his dust. He was not too far now, he had one stop to make before the final leg of his journey. He had to stop in Iacon to pick up an old friend before he could move on to Praxus to save his child and get his mate to remember him. His determination fueling the fire in his spark, he had waited long enough for his mate to remember him but no more, he had waited long enough. He was going to sweep that stubborn doorwinger off his feet, even if it killed him afterward.

He headed towards the exit for the capital, not many bots on the road during the recharge cycle, making his journey a lot quicker. He sped through the industrial center towards the residential center, then further to the headquarters of the Autobots, a place he hadn't been for many vorns.

oOo

When Ratchet heard his internal alarm for his med bay going off, he was slightly shocked to find a mech he hadn't seen in a long while. Crouched in a position to attack, Ratchet commanded the lights to brighten, revealing the white and black paint job and the glowing visor better.

"Been ah while, ay Ratch'?" Ratchet nodded to the saboteur.

"What do you want Jazz?"

"Nice ta see ya too." Ratchet glared at the mech before him, as he slipped into a more comfortable position on the berth. "Ah need ah new disguise, and ya help." For the next Joor Jazz explain about what had happen in Praxus, and how Bluestreak was still missing. Then how he needed a new disguise to go in with; so Smokescreen wouldn't recognize him, yet easy enough to take on and off. Ratchet agreed readily, and spent the next five Joors installing a program and rearranging some armor. During that time, Wheeljack had wandered in and joined the pair by helping updating some of Jazz's weapons. Seven Joors after entering the base, Jazz left with the couple and no one else knew.

oOo

Luckily for the trio, they caught the others traveling to Praxus and they arrived on schedule as the group Prime had sent, with some amendments of course. When they finally arrived at the Praxus station, they were warmly welcomed into the group of mechs, given refreshments then debriefed in what was happening.

"Now, I understand there is a saboteur amongst you, I know they don't like to stand up and let everyone know about this but if they could see me at some point I would appreciate it. That's all mechs, get some rest and report back here at 0700 hours tomorrow." They all ambled out the room, no one noticing the laid back mech slouched in the corner.

"You know, it is dangerous to tell mechs a special ops bot is about?" Constable whipped his helm round to view the mech behind him. A lithe silver mech was slouching behind him, his paint was bright and shiny, he had spiky audio horns, and a glittery light blue visor to cover his optics.

"Yes, I suppose it is. You must be the special ops mech; sorry your name was never given." Jazz eyed up the old mech in front of him, perfectly aware he wanted his designation but he wasn't about to give it to him.

"If I told you that, I would have to kill you." Constable wasn't sure if it was a joke or not, but he knew the mech would not even hesitate in off lining him in a flash. So he nodded solemnly.

"I understand that you would prefer to work alone, and without anyone interference. Since Prime has ordered me to leave you alone, I suppose I have no choice but it goes against my better judgment."

"I understand. I just need all the information you have, including the notes you wouldn't allow the others to know, and a few supplies. Then I'll leave and not see me again till I'm handing the criminal back to you."

"You seem pretty sure of yourself." The chief said, looking at the mech with suspicion in his eyes.

"I know what I can do, and what I can't. I tell you now, no matter how long it takes, I'm getting that child back!" Jazz growled though his vocaliser, before Constable could reply there was a knock on the door that disturbed them. Removing his gaze from the silver mech for a second, when he turned back he was gone. Signing he wandered about the passion in the mech's voice at the end, he seemed intent on ripping the criminal apart with his bare hands, like the mech had personally hurt him. Well, he was special ops maybe he was just full of blood lust like some frontliners.

oOo

:: Honestly Ratch' this voice mod? I sound like a tower mech! Not cool at all! :: Jazz

:: HAHA! If you were a tower mech you would have been disowned by now. :: Ratchet

:: But why do I sound so formal? :: Jazz

:: I couldn't risk an accent, if you bumped into Prowl or Smokescreen you could have been found out. As soon as you put away the disguise you will have you own voice mod back again, okay? :: Ratchet

:: Speaking of Smokescreen here comes the real test. :: Jazz

:: Good luck. :: Ratchet

Jazz was walking around the base like he own the place, ordering bots to do things for him and gathering things for his mission. It was during one of these expeditions, he bumped into Smokescreen, quite literally.

"I'm quite sorry there, I was in my own little world." Jazz said, dropping his arrogance facade for a moment.

"That's all right, wasn't really paying attention myself." Smokescreen said, picking up his datapads he had dropped while Jazz just watched him. "You're the special ops mech everyone is talking about?" Jazz gazed narrowed behind his visor, while trying to maintain an aloof expression.

"I might be, just depends on who is asking."

"I'm Smokescreen, tactician and psychologist of the base." Jazz nodded slowly, he knew that anyway but he wanted Smokescreen to talk to him, so he could gather more information.

"Nice to meet you. I have read your file, your brother is Prowl? The mech's child is the one missing is it not? Bluestreak?" Jazz had to fight hard not to let the emotion to filter into his voice.

"Yes, to both." Smokescreen was started to become suspicious of the mech in front of him, his body language spoke to him in a way that he was hiding something; his voice was strained in repressed emotion and that visor was glowing at him but he couldn't place where he knew it. Jazz noticed the narrowing optics and slight frown that had appeared on the other's faceplates, and decided it was time to go.

"Well, nice to meet you. Bye." Without another word, he slowly made his way down the hall. Quickly disappearing from the red and blue mech's sight.

oOo

Pain. That's all he could feel at the moment, was pain. He really just wanted his spark to give out so he would never have to endure this kind of pain again, it was down to the protoform rattling deep ache kind of pain. But yet, that pain was nothing to the emotional pain he was experiencing. The only thing that was keeping him together was slowly disappearing with each passing orn, his hope that someone was coming to rescue him and take him away from his nightmare was leaving him in despair. With each passing orn he was left in his cell, hope was dripping though his servo like trying to cup energon in your servos and it just running through them. He knew he was dying, dying so slowly from the inside out. Soon he would lose hope, and then despair would over whelm him. No the physical pain did not even compare to his emotional pain. He closed his optics in an attempt to block it all out, and try to hold on for his father, uncle, and his dad. But somewhere in his mind, it told him they weren't coming for him because he wasn't worth saving. With these thoughts running through his CPU, hopelessness dug its dark claws into his spark and started to poison his mind.

oOo

**Authors note:** Okay, I hope that was a quick update for you all! I had fun writing this one, and your encouragement in reviews; alerts; and favs have really helped! Thank you all!

Also to my beta: foghornleghorn83!


	17. Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Thnx for the Memories: Chapter 4:**

Jazz leaned closer to the metal wall, seeing the small flakes of grey paint attached to it. Paint that matched Bluestreak's own dark grey. Collecting the flakes he analyzed the flakes and found they had been there for orns, right at the beginning of his capture. Though many orns had passed and many bots had walked through here, he could still clearly see the struggle Blue must have put up. The path was scuffed, following the trail until he was stopped by the wall, where the marks got confusing yet were still clear.

*Energon levels at 15%*

Jazz brushed aside the warning with ease. Something about the marks were confusing him and he couldn't understand why. Growling slightly, he started his way back to the station for some rest and fuel before he began again. He had been trying to find his son for several orns and he was no closer than any other.

*Energon levels at 7%*

Jazz stumbled through the doors of the station, numbly making his way to the rec room; luckily it was very late into the recharge cycle so no one was there to see him. Well, empty expect the last bot he actually wanted to see: his doorwings were dropped low on his back; his paint was dull and scuffed up; his faceplates were empty, but Jazz knew of the torment below the surface. Jazz's sparked ached at his sadness. Shaking to clear his head, he moved to gather his energon. Choosing the table furthest away from the quite mech, he leaned back to watch him.

All in all, Prowl had change little in Jazz's optics. He looked a lot sadder for obvious reasons. He had heard from his work colleagues, Prowl mainly kept to himself, but was a good worker if not cold and a stickler for the rules. He was content, but Jazz frowned, content without knowing anything to do with him. Finishing his cube quickly, he was then struck with the indecision in what to do. The battle waged in his mind to either confront his fears and face Prowl, or run away again. Growling and cursing himself under his breathe, now was not the time to be thinking about himself when his child needed his help. Standing up quickly he left without a backward glance, completely missing the pale blue optics that watched him leave.

oOo

Smokescreen watched the silver saboteur stalk across the crystal gardens, from where he could see him at his apartment. He was happily basking in the calming glow of the crystals, when he caught the silver ghost out of the corner of his eye. The blue and white mech didn't know what it was about the mech that made his doorwings stand on the edge, but he always felt compelled to trust and to hate him all at once. He watched him swagger his way over to one of the side walls of the garden, and then he slightly shifted his helm giving Smokescreen a slanted look though his visor. The doorwinger was struck with a sudden realization, when he returned his gaze to the other mech, he was already gone.

oOo

Bluestreak shivered against the cold, he wished he had something to distract him from the silence. It was so oppressing, even more than the dark. He had long given up hope that anyone was ever coming to rescue him. Now all he had left was to hope that his death was quick and merciful. If his vocaliser was working, he would have snorted at his own idea, but then again if he had his vocaliser he wouldn't be in this primus damn silence. His newest wounds leaked some energon onto the floor, making the small drip sound louder than what it should have done. Venting his stuttering vents, Bluestreak turned off his optics and tried to recharge while he had the chance.

oOo

_Bluestreak walked into a light filled room, one he had never been into before. Allowing his optics to adjust, he began to examine the room. There was a large berth; a single door leading off to what looked like a private wash rack; a large desk against a wall; large windows that opened up onto a balcony; colored glass hung down from a frame scattering a colorful display of lights throughout the room; and on the balcony there was a golden mech painting the landscape before him._

_The grey mech had no idea who the stranger was, but he felt whole and content in his presence. Automatically he moved to be nearer, to be where he felt safer. Warmth spread over him as he neared him. Without thinking he brought up his arms over the mechs shoulders to hold him close. The other mech stop painting and brought up one of his servos to cover the smaller grey ones. No words were exchanged, but the silence did not bother Bluestreak, for once it surrounded him like a thick blanket of comfort._

_Then he felt the pull of reality again, and fear shot through him. He didn't want to go and leave this mech; he wasn't ready to face the pain and hopelessness that waited for him when he awoke. Obviously the golden mech felt his discomfort and turned to face him, the icy blue optics soften for him while strong arms pulled him close. Bluestreak listened to the lull of his spark beat, soothing his tormented soul._

_"They are coming soon, so you have to wake up. Everything will be alright in the end." His voice was just as beautiful as he was._

_"I don't want to wake up; I want to stay here with you." The golden mech chuckled slightly, and lifted Bluestreak helm so they could meet their optics._

_"I will always be with you, even if you don't know it." Bluestreak offered a small smile, just before their lips met._

oOo

Smokescreen stormed though the Praxus enforcers building; and straight to the med bay where he knew he would find Ratchet and some answers. He was furious, glad, and slightly confused. All he wanted was his nephew back and if he could do that he would be glad. But if that pit spawns mech even thought of trying to work his way back just to hurt his brother again, he really needed to think again! He would not allow him to hurt his family again, but then he remembered Prowl before. Did he give him what he has always wanted and leave him open to pain again or not give him the choice again? He pushed aside those thoughts and returned to how much he just hated the mech. Finally he reached the med bay. He wished he could have banged the door open, but settled on banging his fist down on the desk that Ratchet and Wheeljack were working at.

"You let that pit spawn slagger back here?" He seethed. Wheeljack was taken aback by the rare display of anger on the Blue and red mech. Ratchet however looked up with annoyance lining his optics, faceplates calm and composed which was scarier than him being his normal self.

"Good morning Smokescreen, what's the problem?" Smokescreen's fury died then, and he looked at Ratchet with weary optics.

"Why is he back?" The pair of optics met in a clash of concern and wills, battling out for the pair.

"Because he is tired of running and hiding."

oOo

Bluestreak struggled to online his optics as he pulled himself from his recharge. He tensed as he heard a mech make his way towards the small room that he had been kept in for immeasurable amount of time. He flinched when the door swished open, waiting for the mech that had made his life a living hell recently. However he was faced by a rather shocked looking black and white visor mech.

For a while the other mech just stood there, shock slowly eased off his faceplates and was replaced by concern but he still didn't move any closer. Slowly there was a brush of a presence against Bluestreak, causing his vents to stutter more when he recognized the meaning. Slowly Jazz moved forward until he knelt before his creation, who stared at him with wonder in his eyes. Coolant started to pool in both their optics, carefully Jazz cupped Bluestreak's faceplates. He gently stroked his cheek arch, while gazing at wonder at the creation he hardly ever saw.

"You're safe now, my son." So great was the relief, Bluestreak collapsed into his creator's arms and sobbed.

oOo

Prowl was struggling out of his recharge that Ratchet had unceremoniously forced him into, after running his body far longer than he should of. That was over an orn ago, slowly shaking his head to clear his sluggish CPU, he moved to his windows that over looked the crystals gardens. Basking in their early morning glow, he admired their shapes and colors, his spark was calmed. That's when he saw them; his child all fixed and mended walking next to a strange black and white mech. Prowl could hardly believe his optics, until Bluestreak looked up and smiled at him.

"Smokescreen! Wake up!" Prowl called to his brother, as he walked hurriedly out of the apartment dragging a rather confused Smokescreen behind him.

oOo

Jazz smiled as he watched Prowl practically barrel around a corner from where he was leaning against a crystal, and scoop up his creation into a hug in which Bluestreak heartily returned. Smokescreen however was stuck between watching the happy reunion of Prowl and Blue, and watching Jazz. Slowly however he made his way over to the other mech, when he reached him he stopped for several astroseconds. Jazz looked stunned when Smokescreen held out a servo for him to take, fully expecting to have a blow across his faceplates. Carefully Jazz extended his own servo, which was grasped equally.

"Thank you, for everything." Jazz nodded, accepting it as the nearest thing to an apology he would get from the red and blue mech. In their exchange Bluestreak had managed to detach himself from his carrier, as the pair watched with interest. Hesitantly, Prowl moved towards the other Black and white, stopping when he was only a step away. Bright blue optics met for the first in vorns, a small smile etched its way onto the once stoic faceplates.

"Jazz." Clear to all was that, Prowl once again remembered all that had happen before. "Welcome home."

oOo

In a place far away from Praxus, Sunstreaker shuffled in his berth and a small smile crept across his faceplates. He was always right, everything would be alright.

oOo

**Author's note:** I am so sorry for how late this is! I promise I shall update quicker next time, which will be about two weeks. Again, sorry please don't hurt me =)

Once again thanks to my lovely FoghornLeghorn83!


	18. Thnx for the Memories: Epilogue

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Thnx for the Memories: Epilogue:**

If there was one thing that really prolongs Bluestreak returning to his normal self, it was the dark silent recharge cycles. After all the bars and clubs had finally closed down for the night, what was left was emptiness and quiet. Both unnerved Bluestreak more than anything. It stirred him from his recharge and spoke to him in haunted whispers. He tried so hard to fall back asleep, but the deafening silence just took him back to his cold, dark silent cell he spent in.

However after a couple of orns like this, the effects were beginning to show. What was harder was trying to hide it from his creators, who were having a hard enough time trying to patch up their relationship; without the added stress of his lack of recharge added onto their already overflowing plate of concerns. So, it was a definite _no,_ to going to his parents for help. Smokescreen was a no as well since he would just tell his parents anyway. He is an overprotective uncle at his best. No, he decided fully, he would deal with this one on his own.

But, unluckily Bluestreak didn't have the foresight of true nature of his sire, and just how much he could detect when no one else knew.

oOo

It was the second orn back when Jazz started to notice the difference in Bluestreak and on the lack of sleep he had had the previous nights. He gazed at him through his visor, noticing when his creation got a second cube for his morning energon. He couldn't help but find it odd, considering the fact that after what Bluestreak had been through, he was having trouble keeping down nearly a whole cube. Therefore the need for a second cube would mean that Bluestreak needed the extra energon to energize him for the lack of recharge.

It became more obvious still, when by the fifth orn he was having two cubes for his morning and evening meal. He would become withdrawn the closer it came to settling down for evening recharge, and was up before anyone else. Jazz was concerned but not overly so, completely trusting his son to come to them if he wanted to.

By the seventh orn Prowl had noticed that all was not right. He frowned when still, after two cubes in the morning, Bluestreak would tiredly rub at his optics. More concerned now, Jazz decided to dig a little deeper.

"Are you sleeping okay Blue? You're looking rather tired these days." He said off handle one morning during breakfast. Bluestreak ducked his head to hide his embarrassment.

"Of course I am," The lie slid more easily than he expected from his mouth. "It's good to be home and recharging somewhere warm and safe." Blue's optics grew distant for a moment, losing himself into his memories. "Warm and safe." He repeated more softly. And the matter was dropped for a couple more orns, to recover his mental health once more.

oOo

However, try as he might he just could not sleep during the night and now he realised that Jazz was aware of this fact. So he was not surprised when his sire crept into his room late one evening to confront him on such matters. Both deciding it was best if Prowl was left out of it until such time had passed. However no matter what they tried nothing would work. They tried exercising, a warm cube of energon, a small cube of high grade (since he was still not of age.), storytelling, Jazz staying with him, and all sorts of other things. Finally they resigned to the fact they could not find a solution and they would have to tell Prowl and Smokescreen.

It was the next morning they told Prowl, in a tired resigned way, waiting for the logical explanation for it all. But it did not come. For the rest of the orn, Prowl stayed within his office, working on how to solve his creations problem. All hope fled then from Blue. Jazz watched as a few tears leaked from his creations optics. He had never felt so helpless.

oOo

"Singing." Smokescreen said beserkly the next morning, over some energon. All three helms whipped towards him, they had forgotten he was there, so wrapped up in their own thoughts.

"Tried tha' Smokey." Jazz commented for the whole group. Remembering how he could not sing his child to sleep and unable to prevent the nightmares.

"Yes, you have. But has Blue tired finding a song that calms him when he gets over emotional? A song that you can relate to, enough to relax you to sleep? No, I didn't think so." Smokescreen finished the rest of his cube and left, leaving the others to linger in their thoughts.

oOo

"_This is the way you left me,  
I'm not pretending.  
No hope, no love, no glory,  
No Happy Ending_."

Jazz smiled sadly as he felt Prowl snuggle closer into his side, as they listened to the song that was slowly helping their creation, or so they hoped anyway. As the song died, it was soon replaced by the more restful sounds of Bluestreak in recharge and in itself was a lullaby to Jazz, as he too joined his son into the recharge cycle. It had been alright in the end, but he knew that already. After all Prowl has never lied to him.

oOo

**Authors note:** Okay, not exactly two weeks I know! But, my niece was born only a few days ago! Also, I know it's short, but it's just wrapping everything up. Thanks to all my lovers out there, who review and all that jazz!

Special thanks to my beta: FoghornLeghorn83!


	19. Why can't I?: Prologue

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Why can't I?: Prologue:**

It had been so long since he had been here; he was surprised he remembered it at all. Well, it was more of a blur in his mind than an actually memory, a great grey blue in his memory core. But Praxus was still beautiful, more ethereal than what the datapads showed you, it really was breath taking. The bot just smiled. In some ways it was like going back to your grandmother's house, always warm and inviting but still nothing like home.

oOo

Jazz was staring at Prowl while he slept and still could not get over the idea of him being his again, and refusing to leave him. Now, he had the moment to prove that to everyone later this orn. He was finally going to bond to the stunning bot that was currently lying in his arms, deep within recharge.

It was to be the social event of the eon. Prime himself was preforming the ceremony. Praxus had been busying with gossip and business since it had all been announced. Luckily Prowl had taken care of everything whilst Jazz took care of him. Smokescreen and Bluestreak had been quite overwhelmed with joy, and to quote Prowl 'They had been disturbing everything and keeping me behind schedule!'. He was secretly enjoying how enthusiastic they were being and all the attention they were giving him and his future bondmate. Today was going to be prefect, he knew it would be.

"Mornin' Prowler." Jazz murmured as he felt his lover stir out of his recharge cycle.

"My name is Prowl, Jazz. Prowl, not Prowler." He groggily answered, with a hint of a smile playing at his lips. Jazz knew he didn't mind the pet name; he just loved to banter with him.

"Just think, by the time the recharge cycle comes, we will be bondmates!" Jazz all but squealed, as he pressed a light kiss to Prowl's soft lips.

"I know Jazz. I have been planning it for the last… Primus knows how long." Another kiss was given to him, less innocent to the first.

"And Primus knows how much I love you for it." The next Joor was spent with them basking in their love, until they heard Bluestreak moving around their apartment.

oOo

Bluestreak could not help but noticed the pure glow that his creators seemed to be giving off. He couldn't explain it but you could just feel the love by being in the same room as them. He had never been so happy for them, expect for maybe when they had their reunion. Sure, they argued (a lot actually) over the vorns it took them to reach this point, but he always remembered they made up after a fight no matter how big or small it may have been. Save one fight, which started just half a vorn ago, when Bluestreak started dating Clockwise. Clockwise was your typical aristocratic Praxus bot: he dreams of becoming a politician, does what his family asks him to, has a tendency to be annoying, condensing, and arrogant, always polite, nice, and sweet; just what Prowl wanted for him. Jazz couldn't stand him and he really just didn't know why. Luckily they put aside all that for Bluestreak.

Fortunately he was broken from his musings, when the door chime rang.

"I'll get it!" Bluestreak called out, despite Prowl's effort to stop him. He had been trying to break Bluestreak from that habit and he blamed Jazz for it because he did it more often than Blue did. He opened the door, which framed a huge royal blue bot that could only be one bot. "Uncle Sen!" Blue called out and hugged his 'uncle' like he was a sparkling again, despite the fact the bot was in fact a Prime didn't matter at all.

"Oh my little Blue, look at you!" Prime held the youngster at arm's length and studied how much he had grown since he had last seen him, seeing him growing into a mech they would all be proud of. "So where is the happy couple at?"

oOo

After shared energon and a long catch up, Prime took Jazz away to prepare for the ceremony whilst Smokescreen worked on his brother. This left Bluestreak with a lot of free time before the ceremony would be held, in Praxus crystal gardens no less.

So, Blue decided to walk in amongst the tiny streets of Praxus, gazing through the windows till it was time to return home to the house and prepare for the ceremony. He turned down the more art centric part of the lanes, gazing at the working artists and listening to the creative music, quite lost in his own world. The music was light and cheery, matching his mood almost perfectly, and the colours were bright, matching the colours of the rainbow. He had many mechs call out to him as he passed; many were blessings to his parents and congratulations.

So lost in his own world he bumped into another mech, stumbling over an apology, he allowed his optics to travel up the slim line golden chassis and his optics locking with the crystal blue optics. His intakes caught in his lines and his optics shortened. He knew who this mech was before his memory files could bring up their short time together. The only thing that confused him was where the other mech's counterpart was and why he was in Praxus anyway.

"Sunstreaker?"

oOo

**Author's Note:** So sorry for how long it has been! Gosh, this really hardly makes up for it, going through a rather large writers block…I really do apologise!

Thanks to FoghornLeghorn83 for her fabulous patience and beta work!


	20. Why can't I?: Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Why can't I?: Chapter 1:**

Bluestreak watched as his parents came together in front of the gathered crowd, Jazz's smile was blinding whilst Prowl had a so-slight-you-could-miss-it smile tugging at his lips. The crystals danced over their shiny armour, their background hum making the moment so magical it was like a dream. The ceremony was short and sweet, just the way Prowl and Jazz wanted it to be. The vows were beautiful and spoken from the very depths of their sparks, telling about the love and devotion for each other. Bluestreak favourite part of it all; was when Jazz more or less jumped onto Prowl to seal it all with a kiss.

A lot of the mechs present at the ceremony would argue that was more like Prowl style, simple and private a lot like the mech himself. The after party however had Jazz written all over it, it was the party of the vorn, and many vorns to come. High grade was flowing more freely than energon in their lines; the music suited to everyone tastes; even Prime was having a great time; and Jazz and Prowl were glued to each other. For once, everything seemed alright in the world, nothing could have made that night any more prefect than it already was.

oOo

Jazz was positively glowing next to his bondmate, who subtly glowed as well, they had danced; talked; and generally shared their day with all those around them. Everyone was in high spirits, Ironhide was deep in the high grade, and Bluestreak was sitting by himself. Now, Jazz was an observant parent, and quite happily prided himself with that fact, he had seen the mech Bluestreak had been making eyes at for better part of the evening. What a catch he was! The mech was sleek; stylish; nice golden colour; and the deepest Blue set of optics that couldn't be pulled of his son.

Needless to say Jazz was over the moon, he knew Sunstreaker and his twin Sideswipe fairly well from his trips to Iacon, Ironhide was proud about how they were advancing in combat training. Not that silver special ops ever wanted to control who his son saw, but as long as it wasn't the bozo he was seeing now (said bozo had conveniently disappeared a while ago now.). Jazz was happy to watch them danced around each other; after all it was quite cute.

"Sparks fly when they are near each other." Smokescreen said as he snuck up behind his new brother, balancing two cubes of high grade, and one Jazz quickly relieved him off.

"Oh, really?" Jazz commented off handily, trying not to sound too interested.

"Bluestreak hasn't spoken one word to Clockwise since the ceremony, and the grapevine tells me that Clockwise wants to propose." Jazz's years of training to remain completely in character without causing a scene, the mere thought of his lovable; bright; fun son with someone as shallow as Clockwise made his tanks turn. He turned his gaze to the pair of younglings, which were sitting on the opposite side of the room gazing at each other.

"Smokey," Jazz said in his most innocent voice, "want to have some fun?" Smokescreen turned to tell Jazz how inappropriate that sounded, when he noticed the wicked smirk cross his faceplates of his brother, which then slowly slid across his as well.

oOo

Jazz and Smokescreen huddled near the DJ softly arguing to themselves, neither noticing the intense gaze of their Prime on them. He slowly made towards the DJ area, until he stood behind them listening to their slightly heated voice.

"No, that will not encourage what I'm trying to get across!" Jazz muttered as he discarded the music file that Smokescreen had produced form the pile.

"That is a stupid song! Do you want them to commit suicide?" As another was another file was thrown away, raising an optic ridge Prime cleared is vocal cords startlingly the two mechs before him. The pair wore identical looks of mock innocence; he knew they were up to something.

"Hmm, and what do you think you two are up to?" He asked, they held his gaze for a few astroseconds until Jazz bubbled out their plan like an over excited youngling with their first love. Prime levelled them with a thoughtful look before observing his favourite youngling. "Well, I think this one…"

oOo

"This is the one!" Jazz exclaimed excitedly, finally all three of them agreeing on a suitable music file after nearly half a Joor arguing with each other. Smokescreen and Prime nodded approvingly, they were pretty chuffed with their decision.

"No." All three froze, recognising that came from behind them in a slightly detached voice. Prowl lent forward throwing the music file from Jazz's relaxed grip on, picking up another file he held it up. "This is the one that will work, remember that this is Bluestreak." All nodded and set their devious plan into action.

oOo

Jazz wiggled his way over to Bluestreak who was still star strucked in his seat, who gave his father a blinding smile was set to rival Jazz's in years to come.

"Hey, Baby Blue, wanna dance with your daddy?" Bluestreak giggled slightly at how intoxicated Jazz was already, not quite realising Jazz was acting drunk instead. An upbeat type of song came through the speakers, one Bluestreak knew well since Jazz liked to sing it a lot when he was younger and upset. Grabbing his son's wrist he tugged him gently over to the dance floor, and they allowed the familiar dance moves to take over.

"_Baby I knew at once  
That you were meant for me  
Deep in my soul I know  
That I'm your destiny  
Though you're unsure  
Why fight the tide  
Don't think so much  
Let your heart decide." _ Jazz sang and danced besides his creations all in prefect sync, years of dancing around the living room together finally been put to good use.

"_Baby I see your future  
And it's tied to mine  
I look in your eyes  
And see you searching for a sign  
But you'll never fall  
'Til you let go  
Don't be so scared  
Of what you don't know." _Bluestreak sang. His optics drifting, every so often to gaze at the golden mech. The next big surprise was when Prowl came onto the dance floor, happily singing with his two mechs during the chorus, distracting Bluestreak from everything else.

"_True to your heart  
You must be true to your heart  
That's when the heavens will part  
And baby shower you with my love  
Open your eyes  
Your heart can tell you no lies  
And when you're true to your heart  
I know it's gonna lead you straight to  
me."_

"_Got to be true to your heart."_

"_Someone you know is on your side  
Can set you free." _Smokescreen sang, as he hustled onto the floor with them, singing at his nephew who just laughed at him.

_"I can do that for you  
If you believe in me  
Why second-guess  
What feels so right  
Just trust your heart  
And you'll see the light." _ The small family all sang together, when three bots also joined them onto the dance floor: Prime; Ironhide; and Ratchet. Jazz span in front of his family to joined them in singing the next chorus.

"_Ya know it's true!" _ Jazz sang out loud,

"_Your heart knows what's good for you." _Prime sang with his deep baritone._  
"Good for you."_ Followed Jazz._  
"Let your heart show you the way."_ Sang Ironhide._  
"You know it's true!" _interjected Jazz, with his higher note voice against the deep baritones of the three elder mech

"_It'll see you through." _Ratchet finished up their trio verse, all staring at a smiling Bluestreak

"_Got to be true to your heart!" _All of them finished, leading into a short musical interval, where a graceful whirlwind of red and gold swept in and stole the next verse.

"_Girl my heart is driving me to where you are." _Sideswipe sang first, both of them picking up their own dance moves and slightly following the others.

"_You can take both hands off the wheel and…"_ Sunstreaker sang, his voice only a twinge deeper than his brothers, but not really noticeable unless you are Jazz.

"…_Still get far!" _They sang together, dragging Bluestreak into their crazy dance, clapping their servos in time with the music

"_Be swept away enjoy the ride." _Sideswipe took over again, smiling like he own the world and everything in it at the moment in time.

"_You won't get lost." _Sunstreaker sang with his smirk in place.

"_With your heart to guide you." _They finished, leading everyone into the finishing chorus.

"_True to your heart  
You must be true to your heart  
That's when the heavens will part  
And baby shower you with my love  
Open your eyes  
Your heart can tell you no lies  
And when you're true to your heart  
I know it's gonna lead you straight to  
me  
(Got to be true to your heart) _

_When things are getting crazy  
And you don't know where to start  
Keep on believing baby  
Just be true to your heart  
When all the world around you  
It seems to fall apart  
Keep on believing baby  
Just be true to your heart."_ It was an amazing sight watching all of the bots dancing in sync and singing together, and it set the mood for most of the evening, which was happiness; dancing; laughing; and a heck load of drinking.

oOo

It was about half way through the night when Sideswipe stepped outside for some fresh air, from the rapidly heating party room. He decided that Sunstreaker would hardly miss him for a few astro minutes while he took a stroll around the gardens. He walked past many couples on his travels, but he politely looked away not in his usual mischievous mood on such a good night. He was turning the second to last corner, when he stumbled across the last couple. However instead of just walking past ignoring them like the others, he hid around one of the larger crystals to look at the couple. His optics widen when he got a good look at who they were.

"No way!" he whispered to himself, as he went slacked jawed.

oOo

**Author's note:** Please, don't kill me! I know how late it is and I profusely apologize and grovel at your feet! But better late then never, eh? Okay, it doesn't flow like it should, but the whole party at the end came from the family reunion I had recently, and I thought 'My family so damn crazy, but it's fun!' …The whole family dancing and singing, yeah that's my family…except none of us can dance or sing! So thank you, my weird; crazy; musically challenged family!

And thank you lot for sticking with me!

Oh, I also don't own the song: True to your heart by 98 degrees (Mulan)


	21. Why can't I?: Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Why can't I?: Chapter 2:**

Sideswipe stumbled back from where he was currently hiding behind a crystal, turning he ran back to the party, hoping with his entire spark that what he saw was right. He couldn't believe it, it was prefect and yet all so wrong. There would be sparkache; there would be yelling; it would ruin Prowl and Jazz's special day…that made Sideswipe stop, while the news needed to be told right away, he just couldn't bring himself to do it today. He was sure it could wait until tomorrow it's not like anything would happen before then. CPU settled on the matter, he slowed his pace down, though what he saw still nagged at him.

oOo

Sideswipe was still stumblingly towards the tent when he literally bumped into Ironhide, as he swiftly caught the red mech as he tumble passed.

"Whoa there, Sideswipe. Where's the fire?" The older mech chuckled to his self, until he really started to see Sideswipe. The Young mech was shivering, his optics were wild. "Sideswipe!" Ironhide cried as he shook the other mech, assuming Sideswipe had just ingested too much High grade. He was fine only breems ago. Sideswipe shook himself out of his own CPU, and stared at his mentor.

"I saw… Clockwise with…" The red mech stuttered, shaking even more. Not truly understanding the importance of the person, Ironhide tried to think of a way to get his young charge to talk. Smiling to himself, he put on his trainer's face.

"Sideswipe! Report what you had just witness!" Snapping to attention, the young mech gathered his wits about himself.

"I just saw Clockwise, lover of Bluestreak, in one of the shadowed areas of the park with another bot." Ironhide relaxed, the young bot was just concerned over his friend, after seeing his lover with someone else. But by the way the night was going for Bluestreak; Ironhide really didn't think he was going to mind.

"Is that all solider?" The older mech asked with a grin. "Nothing to worry about till the morning, he probably just overcharged!" However the concern didn't leave Sideswipe face masks, and he jittered around.

"That's not all." Ironhide raised an optic ridge, curious to know what had worked the mech up. "He was with a Decepticon."

oOo

Bluestreak was having a fantastic night, he was slightly tipsy, but was laughing and enjoying himself. Sunstreaker had stayed near him, his parents were happy, and Prime had engaged in a drinking game with Ratchet. Everyone was having the time of their lives. He was standing near the edge of the party, doorwings twitching to the beat of the music, as he watched Jazz dance around the room with Prowl. His optics followed the graceful movements, as the flowed from one step to another. However his view was then obscured by a large golden chassis.

"May I have this dance?" Sunstreaker asked as he bowed low and offered his servo to the grey mech. Giggling to himself, Bluestreak gladly took hold of the servo before he was whisked onto the floor, wandering how this night could get more prefect.

oOo

Ironhide and Sideswipe hid behind some crystals as they watch the two mechs a little way away from them. They were not like the other couples, expressing love and friendship; they hid in the shadows like it was a sinister cloak over them, deceiving people of their true intent.

The mech Clockwise was talking to; was a well know Decepticon that had a supposedly clear record. His name was Dealer, the black and silver mech was known for double dealings and dealing thing he shouldn't. However, there was never any solid evidence to convict of anything, so he remains out of a cell. Though the latest he had been rumoured with; was a truly disturbing thought indeed.

The conversation was too low to hear, but their body language spoke volumes. They were hunched over, trying to blend with the shadows; they mainly had their backs to the path. Their servo movements were urgent and swift. Something major was happening, if only they could close enough to listen. As they were silently agreeing to move closer, both mechs moved off in different directions. With little to do they followed Clockwise back to the party, making sure nothing bad would ruin Prowl and Jazz's day.

oOo

Sunstreaker and Bluestreak were dancing with a lot of other bots to fast beat track when the music changed to a slower song, swiftly closing the distance between them willingly. The song was about half way through when a voice Bluestreak hadn't heard from all night cut in.

"Do you mind if I interrupt?" Moving apart bashfully, Sunstreaker bowed out to Bluestreak's lover. The pair moved stiffly together, and Blue's smile faded a little as the song progressed. "I have an announcement to make at the end of the song." Clockwise informed his lover, quite unexpectedly midway through the dance.

"Oh? And what might that be?" The upper class mech laughed, while Blue managed a tight smile.

"You'll have to wait and see." Bluestreak hates surprises, not that Clockwise cared about that. The Song slowed to a stop, as the DJ ranged out for Clockwise to make his announcement. The mech dragged his younger lover through the crowd till he reach the middle of the room, Bluestreak was particularly burning with embarrassment. Even more so, when Clockwise knelt down in front of him.

"I apologise for stealing the spotlight for a moment, from Prowl and Jazz. But, I can no longer keep this feeling in my chest, it longs to free and you have inspired me to conquer my fear to do so." He took a deep breathe.

"Bluestreak: my love; my spark; my soul. I love you, more and more each passing day, and it becomes unbearable that I know that you cannot be mine in a way that I wish. For you to be there by my side when I wake up and when I charge down at night, for to love orn in orn out for centuries to come. Will you do me the honour, of bonding to me?" The crowd gasped, as Bluestreak's parents exchanged a trouble look. The grey mech himself was shocked; he turned his optics to the crowd searching for his parents, hoping they'll give him so silent advice. However, the moment he looked up, he locked optics with a sharp pale blue. Sunstreaker gazed at Bluestreak with so much emotion, that Bluestreak felt calmer and knew his answer right away.

"No." The grasped from the crowd was louder this time, louder than the several signs of relief coming from many mechs. "Because, I don't love you." Smiling, Jazz secretly high fived Sideswipe who stood behind him; and Prime exchanged credits with Ratchet. While Bluestreak's calm baby blue optics gazed back into the enraged purple ones of Clockwise.

"Well, I suppose you leave me no choice then." At that moment, the whole room plunged into darkness.

oOo

Several femmes screamed as a confused shuffle to return the lights back on. Prowl and Jazz were too relieved to see Bluestreak still were he was, too notice who was missing. As they approached the young mech, who was frantically searching amongst the crowd for someone.

"He is long gone, and I would say not coming back." Prowl commented out loud, as Jazz watched his offspring get more concerned at his lack to find who he was looking for.

"Where's Sunstreaker?" Frowning the pair looked at their son, before scanning the room. "And Sideswipe?" Growing concerned, as they also could not spot the twins.

"Sideswipe was stood right behind me, they might have gone outside?" A quick search outside dismissed that option, they started asking around.

Soon the search included nearly everyone, but there was no sign of the twins. Even Jazz could find nothing. They answered no hails or calls.

After some time, the enforcers where called in to help, but it was useless the twins were gone.

oOo

**Author's note:** Please don't kill me. I know it's late and it's another cliff hanger…but…I don't really have an excuse. I typed and this is what came out of it all! Anyway, sorry it is so late!

Thank you to all my reviews, etc. Hopefully this isn't a disappointment!


	22. Why can't I?: Epilogue

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Why can't I?: Epilogue:**

The acid rain continued to pour down onto the city, the gentle pitter patter, and the sizzle as it hit the metal buildings. There was something quite soothing about the sounds of rain, at least which is what Jazz always thought. Nature's own music to his audios.

So it came no surprise to Jazz, as he walked into his apartment to see his only child sat in the living room window watching as the rain poured down onto his beloved city. His usual bright blue optics were dull form lack of recharge, his posture was slumped and defeated. Not that Jazz could blame him, it had been nearly a stellar cycle since the Twins had disappeared without a trace, and hope of finding them was slowly running low. Jazz had scoured the city and surrounding areas, he had then travelled around the whole planet, and still no one had seen nor heard anything of the twins.

It was hard to watch Bluestreak for the first few orns after the party, but now, it was like slowly digging in an energon knife into his very spark. Bluestreak was not the same anymore, he barely spoke; he barley recharged; and he avoided most bots as well. Ratchet wasn't doing much better, and Ironhide was having a major guilt trip.

He rested a comforting servo on his shoulder plating as he lean down to kiss his helm, before moving to the office where his bond mate was waiting.

oOo

Prowl stood rigid staring out of his window, no idea his son mimicked him in the other room; his doorwings only gave away the deep disappointment in his spark. Jazz knew then, that's there was no hope of finding the twins. Loss clawed at his spark chamber demanding to be let free, but held back for his love ones that needed him to be strong for them now.

Moving slowly over to his mate, he ran his servos down his door panels soothingly. As Prowl relaxed back into his arms as the circled his waist, Jazz placed a loving kiss to the back of the Black and White's neck cables. For a long while they remained silent, absorbed in their thoughts and feelings, some Prowl couldn't really process.

Prowl was the first one to pull away, as he returned to his desk, Jazz swiftly following. Collapsing into the chair opposite, he gazed at his mate intently. There was more than grief and quilt plaguing his mate; he could sense something else lurking beneath the surface of the cool exterior. Feeling curious he pokes at the bond, to which he receives a raised eyebrow ridge for.

"Something wrong, love?" He asked, when his mate refuse to indulge his curiosity. Prowl looked up from the work he was working through, and studied his stubborn mate in front of him.

"I'm concerned about Bluestreak."

"I am too, but that's not the answer."

"Ratchet would like to arrange a service in memory of the twins."

"So, there is no hope?" Prowl shook his head. "I'll do it, no offence love but I'm better at it. But, that's still not it."

"Prime wants me to go work for him." Jazz looked at his pedes, then back to his mate who gazed back at him. "He wants you and Smokescreen there too."

"Okay, so…" Jazz could see several good things about moving away, and not so many bad things, it seem like an all win scenario.

"I'm not comfortable with moving Bluestreak after what just happen, and I don't think using one of Smokescreen's plans here is going to work." He didn't think of that.

"Problematic."

"Prime understands, he only wants the best for Bluestreak. But the war is escalating; we are needed in Iacon, by Prime's side. My battle computer is giving me all the statistics, but I will not go for any that are below 90% for Bluestreak's benefits." Prowl said in a firm voice, one he used when dealing with the enforcers under his command. Jazz just tilted his head and smiled softly at his mate, he forgot one thing.

"Did you try asking Blue what he wanted to do?" Prowl stopped writing on his PADD for a moment to think, before looking up at his mate.

"I didn't think of that." Jazz suppressed his laugh, settling for just a smile while he got glared at.

"Of course you didn't love. Blue? Can you come here a second?" Bluestreak thought he was entering an interrogation when he entered the room, with both his parents on one side of the desk and an empty chair waiting for him to occupy.

oOo

The corrugation was small and private; all hope was sapped from the room along with happiness. They spoke of Sideswipe's cherry smile and Sunstreaker's amazing talent, some about the bond between the brothers. There was just a small monument, on top of a hill outside of Praxus.

The small statue stood about a foot high: it was of two bodies, twisted and twirled around each other, made out of the purest silver. There was a small engraving on the bottom, which read: _Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, bright and cherry as their paintjobs and as surely missed._

Most mechs surrounding the monument, had said something, and the only person remain was Bluestreak. He shuffled forward towards the statue, fiddling with something in his hands.

"At the moment when it matters most, I find that I can't find the words to say what I truly feel. You were both everything, though we had but few precious moments together it's like we have already had a lifetime and no time at all. I'm going to miss you Sideswipe, you were my sunshine on a dark day. Your laughter was slightly maniacal at times, but always lifted my spirits. You were a truly great friend, my best friend. Sunstreaker…I…" The grey mech choked on sobs and a word that he could not force passed his vocaliser, Prowl moved to be beside his son but was caught by Jazz. His mate shook his head subtly, as he spoke through the bond.

_Wait, he needs to do this by himself._

"…You know what I want to say, because I know you felt it too. That stirring… That need … to be closer. I know, I do. But I knew you to know, that when _he_ asked me to bind myself to him, I saw you and I knew I couldn't do it. But you gave me strength to say no, you made me feel safe enough to say no. All in one look, you told me everything I have ever wanted to know in one look. I love you Sunstreaker and I will not stop loving you. I will never give up hope either, that someday somehow that you will come back to me, dragging a smiling Sideswipe behind. You will come back, and until you do I will be waiting for you. Both of you. Because in the end, that is all I'm ever going to need."

He looked down at the package in his hands, and slowly began to unwrap his gift.

"I made this, and I know it's not up to your expertise, but it was kinda short notice." The final piece of cloth fell away to reveal a weird type of staff, there was a ball made of swirls of gold and red which was attached to a staff of twirling strands of further red and gold. He moved to the statue, and slotted the staff through one of the outstretched servos running down the centre of the two bodies, the colours brightly contrasting with the bright silver. When the setting star light hit the ball, it glowed with an inward light, making the statue seem alive.

"It's perfect Bluestreak, they would have loved it." Ratchet told the young mech, as they basked in the soft glow.

The grey mech could only nod, as he rubbed a servo over his aching spark.

oOo

**Author's Note:** This was actually meant to be a happy chapter, but I think can all safely I cannot for the life of me write something happy. On the bright side, it wasn't a cliff hanger; on the down side I'm pretty sure some of you want to kill me right now. Fear not! There is a plot going on here, somewhere, by the end you might see it.

Well, thank you for all my enthusiastic replies! Much love 3


	23. Stand In The Rain: Prologue

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own it! =(

**Stand in the rain: Prologue:**

"Aww, but Papa I'm almost finished packing to come join you both!" Bluestreak moaned into the call as he chatted to the older mech, Jazz simply grinned back at him. The family had been apart for many years now, with only occasional visits and calls to keep them in touch. Since the war still had yet to shed blood, but Prowl knew it wouldn't be too long. He had done the Math.

"Yeah, I know Blue. But your father and I can't wait to have you here with us again. We've missed you Baby Blue." Jazz said with a smirk it had been Stella cycles since he had last seen his child, and the calls just aren't the same.

Bluestreak had decided to stay within Praxus and in his academy until his graduation, when he would join his parents once again in the heart of Cybertron, Iacon. It had been lonely at first, but with his friends and mentors there around him, Bluestreak had steadily became more independent and less reliant on the people around him. But that doesn't mean he has missed his parents and friends, he couldn't wait to go join them and help in the Autobot cause. Prowl and Jazz weren't happy about the idea of him becoming a solider, but at least that way they could keep an optic n him and knew he could defend himself.

"Still, I'll be there in a few orns, so will you allow me to get on with it?" Blue answered his Papa back in a playful tone, it was teasing Jazz had gotten use to as Blue grew into himself more.

"I'll let you go, since it means you'll be with us sooner." He smiled softly at his son, in a rare moment between the two.

"Give Father my love."

"I will do, love you Blue."

"Be there soon Papa." Bluestreak's smiling face was the last thing Jazz saw before the call was cut. The black and white signed heavily, there was a lot that him and Prowl hadn't told Blue about the war since a lot of it was happening behind the scenes.

The war was getting worse for them, Megatron was strong and had was building himself an impressive army to take what he wanted if Sentential didn't give him what he wanted. It had the leadership of the Autobots on edge, there was no predicting Megatron and what he will do. He was insane, and unpredictable which made him even more dangerous. They were scared, the future was looking good.

oOo

Prowl was working late in the office again, he had not long been given several detailed reports from some of Jazz's spies, and if the information they were feeding Prowl's battle computer the outcome was not looking good. In fact it was it had been confirmed to be worse.

Prowl wasn't sure what to do, which was a first. After checking the results and plans, gathering every speck of information he could possibly gather the conclusion remained the same. He sent an alert to Prime for an emergency meeting, a perk of being second in command – getting Prime's attention when it was needed. It was needed now more than ever, Prowl's spark pulsed with fear and a hope that they weren't too late.

oOo

"Are you sure Prowl?" Prime asked, even though he knew Prowl would have already made certain before coming to him.

"94.73% positive that the working outs are correct, give or take some for Megatron changing his mind." Damn, this was bad. Very bad indeed, if it was to actually happen.

"So, we have a Joor to make a plan and to get everyone to safety. Doesn't sound too hard at all." Prime commented with a roll of his eyes. "Go tell Jazz, and I'll call in the others."

oOo

Jazz was surprised when Prowl barged into their room, his partner seemed his usual cool calm self, but Jazz could see the silver of fear shining in his optics.

"Hey lover, what's up?" he asked rising out of his chair to confront Prowl, but the black and white passed him for the computer.

"I've just discovered a plot by the Decepticons, have you just finished talking to Blue?" Jazz frowned behind his visor, he could tell Prowl was nearing full blown fear.

"Yeah not too long ago, he is fine and be here in a couple of orns. What's the problem?" Prowl sent a data-packet to Jazz containing everything he knew, one look between solidified what they needed to do.

"Computer contact Bluestreak." Prowl said in his command tone of voice. The computer dutifully dialled for Bluestreak, but all they got for static.

"Service is unavailable." The computer droned at them, that was something that has never happen before.

"Computer contact Bluestreak." Prowl commanded again, and the results were the same. They tried other people they knew in Praxus, but again it was the same. Jazz and Prowl shared a concerned look, if Praxus had been cut off from the outside world that would mean one thing – Prowl was wrong.

oOo

a slight droning noise woke Bluestreak from his light slumber, he had never heard such noise before. It rattled through him and his apartment, shaking everything around the rooms. He moved in his living room towards his computer when he heard an odd whistling sound.

That's when he saw the first bomb hit Praxus, he saw the blinding flash of light that was sound followed by a thundering sound as the building collapsed with mechs and femmes trapped inside. Bluestreak in blind panic tried to contact his parents but to no anvil, he knew he was completely alone.

After a few moments of sheer panic washing over him, he managed to get his CPU to work. Knowing he wasn't safe where he was he quickly made his way out of his apartment, and down to the streets where chaos was raining down upon them. It felt like judgement day had finally arrived, and it came in flashes of lights and sounds of Primus's wrath.

oOo

**Author's note:** I live! Amazing isn't it? Okay, so this chapter isn't great…I know, and after how long you lot have waited I should do better…I suck I know. But atlas! I now know what I want to write, so you lovely bunch have about 7 more chapter left of this story give or take. That was the good news, the bad news is me getting it out of my head and into a page. But you lot keep me going, so hopefully (though I promise nothing!) it shouldn't have to wait as long as last time =)

Thank you for supporting me, you are amazing!


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